46 · T H E U N D E R DOG A DVA N TAG E
nothing but cry. I heaved and sobbed and cried like I was dying. And honestly, part of me felt like I had died.
I couldn’t sleep a wink that night. All night, between my sobs, all my negative self-talk came back. Who the hell did I think I was? He’s right. I am just a nobody from Marl- boro, New York. I’m just a dreamer like so many people have accused me of being in the past. I don’t belong out here. I should never have let this happen. David called me the next morning, apologized, and told me what I already knew: the deal was off. I got on the next plane back to New York, and slunk home. I got off the plane from California, tail between my legs, feeling pathetic. After a full day of travel, I finally got back tomy place late at night. My answeringmachine was going crazy with messages. One of my apartment houses had a literal sewage explosion. There was an issue with the septic tank being clogged and all the waste from the three stories above it dumped into one little bathroom. The sewage was literally knee-high in his bathroom, and of course, he’s calling me screaming that there’s shit all over his house. Believe it or not, it actually got worse.
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