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BE KIND TO YOURSELF
With These No-Nonsense Techniques
Here’s what I learned.
BEING KIND TO YOURSELF WON’T MAKE YOU WEAK OR DELUSIONAL. Studies show folks with more self-compassion tend to be more motivated and more successful over time. They see their mistakes, but because they don’t beat themselves down with blame and judgement, they learn to do better next time. It’s choosing self-construction over self- destruction. Sign me up! So how do you do it?
TIPS ON BEING KIND TO YOURSELF:
1. Stop beating yourself up for having negative thoughts and emotions. It’s part of our journey as humans. Think of negative thoughts and emotions as data. They can actually be valuable signs of who you are and what really matters to you. 2. Recognize them and name them, so you can do something constructive with them: “I’m feeling frustrated. What is that pointing to that’s important to me? What is it teaching me?”
Good or bad, I value toughness. Sometimes I overdo it, especially with my children. When one falls down hard, my immediate response is “Get up,” even as blood pours and tears flow. I suspect Mamie — that’s what I call my wife — thinks I could’ve used a sister to soften me up a bit. Seeing how she and my daughters have done that over the years, she’s right. Sometimes I overdo toughness on someone else, too — me. I bet you do it, too. So, I’m exploring being kind to myself. Before you roll your eyes (like I would) thinking this’ll be some touchy-feely article about your inner child, let me state this principle in the most enduring, macho terms, edited for a family newsletter:
3. If this is hard for you, then don’t beat yourself up!
4. Use the process to figure out the best thing to do. Ask yourself, “What can I do that would best serve me, my values, and my goals?” So, in a nutshell, when it comes to undesirable thoughts and emotions, don’t judge. Look and learn, then do the best possible thing. Fair warning on the article: She does talk about tapping into your inner child. I just can’t get you there. Maybe one day. Don’t worry, I’ve already forgiven myself. See, this stuff really works.
DON’T LET THE “MEAN PEOPLE” GET YOU DOWN.
And you, yourself, might be the mean person.
Since I’m wading into uncharted waters here, I did some reading and found a fantastic article by Susan David, a psychologist at Harvard Medical School. (Read the article here: DrHappy.com.au/2020/02/26/how-to-be-kinder-to-yourself.)
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A VOYAGE FOR THE SOUNDS OF EARTH Record Your Own Audio Time Capsule
RECORD YOUR OWN MESSAGE
In 1977, a NASA committee led by esteemed astrophysicist and author Carl Sagan set out to record images and sounds from around Earth, which were then enshrined in two copper records that included music, languages, and natural sounds from around the world. The Voyager 1 and Voyager 2 spacecraft carry these records, and since the ‘70s, they have explored space and routinely sent transmissions to Earth about what they have encountered. As Sagan said of the Voyager mission, “The spacecraft will be encountered and the record played only if there are advanced spacefaring civilizations in interstellar space, but the launching of this ‘bottle’ into the cosmic ‘ocean’ says
Take inspiration from the Voyager mission by setting out to create a recorded message with your family that can serve as a time capsule for others to enjoy for years to come. As a starting point, ask your kids what they would want to tell future generations or interstellar travelers. What does life on Earth look like to them? Your messages don’t have to be solely futuristic, either. You can record a message to loved ones and have fun sharing it with them. Think of a family member or friend who could use a pick-me-up and create a recording just for them.
KEEP IT SIMPLE
Most phones and computers have an audio recorder app, and this should be all you need to make a recording. Start by creating your message. You can improvise or write a script beforehand. Then, use your phone or computer to record it. This file can be shared on different platforms and sent to the people you’d like to hear your message.
something very hopeful about life on this planet.” We may still not have definitive answers about extraterrestrial life, but that doesn’t prevent us from thinking about what we might want to tell others about life on Earth. So, why not make your own recording?
Have fun with this project and think of it as your chance to tell others what life on Earth means to you.
Testimonial HEAR WHAT OUR CLIENTS HAVE TO SAY ABOUT US! “John Holland and his staff were great when helping me with my divorce several years ago! I would definitely recommend this attorney office for anyone needing assistance with any legal situation, from divorce to workers’ comp.” -Joy “I highly recommend Rob; he took my case that seemed like a sure loss and turned it into a winning case for me. He was very professional, easy to work with, and very knowledgeable in every aspect.” -Nathan
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Keep Fighting for What’s Right
Your Personal Injury Case Is Too Important to Give Up
THE WRONGDOER’S STANDPOINT
During a time when our legal system is going through fits of starts and stops, it’s difficult to understand how and if you should persevere with your personal injury case. We want you to know that you absolutely should because the purpose of injury law is important, and a pandemic doesn’t change that. From a human standpoint, injury law is necessary and important, especially when you look at it from two critical perspectives: that of the victim and of the wrongdoer.
Injury law encourages us to watch out for others’ safety. If someone decides to break rules that harm another, they subject themselves to three important points of proof. 1. A rule protected the hurt person from being hurt. 2. The wrongdoer broke the rule. 3. Breaking the rule caused harm and loss.
THE VICTIM’S VIEWPOINT
Injury law is far from “money for nothing.” The purpose of the money given is to balance out harm and loss caused by a wrongdoer, and it does so in three important ways.
Each case may not be as black-and-white as the above list suggests, and that’s up to a judge or jury to decide. But injury law always holds those responsible accountable. Injury law is important and necessary because it keeps everyone safe by creating rules and meaningful consequences for breaking them. So don’t stop treating your injuries or fighting your case just because the pandemic is making it difficult. Stay diligent and uphold your rights. Holland & Usry is here to help you every step of the way, so reach out and we’ll discuss your options.
1. 2. 3.
It fixes what can be fixed. It helps what can be helped.
It replaces what cannot be fixed or helped.
We’re blessed to live in a society that values safety over money. When someone strips us of part of who we are or stops our life in its tracks, injury law protects us by ensuring fair compensation for harm and loss.
Good News
“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” –Corinthians 4:8-9 “And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong,
GRILLED BASIL CHICKEN AND TOMATOES
You can’t go wrong with grilled chicken and tomatoes on a warm summer’s evening. It’s a simple recipe that packs a flavor punch.
Ingredients
• • • •
2 tbsp olive oil 1 clove garlic
•
1/4 cup tightly packed fresh basil leaves
1/2 tsp salt
• •
8 Roma tomatoes
3/4 cup balsamic vinegar
4 boneless skinless chicken breast halves (4 oz each)
Directions 1. For marinade: In blender, combine olive oil, garlic, salt, vinegar, and basil. Cut 2 tomatoes into quarters and add to mixture. Cover and process until blended. Halve remaining tomatoes for grilling. 2. In bowl, combine chicken and
3. Heat grill to about 350–400 F. Lightly oil grates. Grill chicken until internal temperature reads 165 F, about 4–6 minutes per side. Grill tomatoes until lightly browned, about 2–4 minutes per side. Discard remaining marinade. 4. Serve chicken and tomatoes with reserved marinade.
firm and steadfast.” –1 Peter 5:10
2/3 cup marinade. Cover and refrigerate for 1 hour. Reserve remaining marinade.
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Inspired by TasteOfHome.com
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* This newsletter is intended to educate the public about personal injury, workers’ compensation, criminal defense, and family law issues. You can copy and distribute it as long as you copy the entire newsletter. But the newsletter is not intended to be legal advice; you should ask a lawyer about your specific case. Every case is different, and all case outcomes depend on unique facts and laws.
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INSIDE this issue
1
Be Kind to Yourself
2
Create Your Own Audio Time Capsule
3
Keep Up With Your Personal Injury Case
Grilled Basil Chicken and Tomatoes
4
Help Local Nonprofits in Challenging Times
If you no longer want to receive this newsletter, call Pam at 864.582.0416 or email rob@bhollandlawfirm.com .
THE BEST WAYS TO HELP LOCAL NONPROFITS IN CHALLENGING TIMES
tight. Instead, consider cleaning out your closet. What clothes, shoes, or other accessories can you part with? What about dishware or small appliances? When you clean out your home and donate unused items, you benefit those in the community who need them most.
VOLUNTEER
In a time of social distancing, volunteering may be discouraged, but nonprofits still need volunteers to operate. The good news is that many nonprofits need volunteers for positions that maintain social distance, such as driving. Food banks and kitchens need drivers to pick up donations or ingredients from donors and to deliver food to people in need, such as the elderly or those with disabilities.
Over the past several months, families, businesses, and nonprofits have had to navigate life in this challenging “new normal,” and it can be hard to support your favorite nonprofits when times are tough. Here are a few ways you can help these important entities, even when you don’t have resources to spare right now.
ADVOCATE
DONATE
Even if you don’t have time or resources to give, you can become an advocate for important causes around your community. While it might not seem like much, sharing information about local nonprofits on social media can make a genuine difference. Nonprofits need exposure, which is greatly boosted through community support. Sharing useful information about nonprofits — or sharing their posts — increases their visibility so more people will take action.
While many people donate generously during the holiday season, remember that nonprofits need donations throughout the year, and different nonprofits need different things. A monetary donation can often go a long way, but never feel obligated to give money, especially when your budget may be
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