of ‘Truth’ in Dementia Care
SHE WENT 30 FEET OFF PATH And Reminded Me What Really Matters
ant not to confront mer’s patient. Even y untrue, there’s no ity onto them. Instead, a sense of calm and on ctive strategies is ersation is creating e it somewhere else. suggest an activity, or something comforting. ask about someone might respond briefly y’re doing well. Hey, nt to sit down and e tea?” This keeps ction light and avoids sary emotional strain. rstanding rapeutic Fibbing’ ncept in dementia care feel strange at first. peutic fibbing means
going along with their version of reality when it helps prevent distress. For instance, if they ask about someone who passed away, it’s okay to say they’re “doing fine,” rather than correcting them. Many people feel uneasy about this approach because it can seem dishonest, but reframing it helps: You’re not lying for your benefit. Instead, you’re responding in a way that supports their emotional well-being. It’s About Them, Not You This is perhaps the hardest but most important mindset shift. These interactions aren’t about your comfort; they’re about theirs. Even if a response feels unnatural or uncomfortable to you, what matters most is how it affects the person living with dementia. When you lead with empathy instead of accuracy, you create a space where they feel safe, understood, and cared for, and in the end, that’s far more meaningful than being right.
What if the secret to feeling better wasn’t another productivity hack, but something much simpler … like laughter? World Laughter Day, celebrated on May 3, is a reminder that joy doesn’t have to be complicated or earned. Sometimes, it just shows up in the most unexpected places, like my extremely stubborn donkey, Betty. People sometimes ask, “What’s her purpose?” And I always come back to the same answer. She makes me laugh! It’s always pure, unexpected humor in my day that always helps to brighten things up. The other day, I was in a hurry and trying to get things done, and Betty decided that was the perfect moment to go about 30 feet out of her way just to find a slightly better patch of dirt to roll in. I was calling her, trying to move things along, and she acted completely unbothered. She had her plan, and clearly, my timeline wasn’t part of it. Eventually, she made her way toward the barn, but even that was on her terms. She took the longest route possible, like she was deliberately stretching the moment out. Then, of course, she rolled, fully committed, and somehow managed to roll right out of her halter, which she does from time to time. For a second, I braced myself. Because sometimes, that’s her cue to take off and make a run for it. But not this time. This time, she just stood there and looked at me. Completely still. Like, “Well? Now what?” And I couldn’t help it; I just laughed. These moments that give me those chuckles stick with me. They remind me that not everything has to be so serious or rushed. I spend hours trying to stay on schedule, be efficient, and keep things moving, and then Betty shows up with her hilarious detours and her dirt patches, and suddenly none of that feels quite as important. Laughter is magic. It has this way of making a difference in your day by shifting your mood almost instantly. For me, it takes the edge off, lightens the day, and gives me a little reset. Plenty of science backs that up, but I don’t even need the research because I feel it in those moments. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that joy doesn’t wait for permission. Sometimes, it just wanders 30 feet off the path, rolls in the dirt, and dares you to smile.
Sizzling Chinese Pepper Steak With Onions
Ingredients
• Salt and
Steak • 1 tbsp soy sauce • 1 tbsp oyster sauce • 1 tbsp grated fresh ginger • 2 cloves garlic, minced • 1 tsp sesame oil
pepper, to taste • Steamed rice or noodles Sauce • 2 tbsp soy sauce • 2 tbsp hoisin sauce • 2 tbsp rice vinegar • 1 tbsp cornstarch
• 1 lb beef strips (sirloin or rib eye) • 3 tbsp vegetable oil, separated • 1 large onion, sliced
Directions
1. In a medium bowl, whisk together soy sauce, oyster sauce, ginger, garlic, and sesame oil. 2. Toss beef strips in marinade; let sit 10–15 minutes. 3. In a skillet over medium heat, heat 1 tbsp vegetable oil, then add sliced onions. 4. Sauté until soft, slightly caramelized; season with salt and pepper, remove from pan, and set aside. 5. In the same skillet, heat 2 tbsp vegetable oil over high heat. 6. Add marinated beef strips; stir-fry for 2–3 minutes until browned. 7. In a small bowl, whisk together soy sauce, hoisin sauce, rice vinegar, and cornstarch.
8. Pour sauce over beef and simmer until thickened. 9. Add sautéed onions back into pan; stir to combine. 10.Serve hot over steamed rice or noodles.
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