Lighting Fireworks in Your Life July 2019
READY TO TAKE THE NEXT STEP
For the Fourth of July, we often head out of town for the weekend to relax as a family. Lately though, we’re exploring the tradition of going to West Palm Beach to watch the fireworks. It feels like a special way to celebrate the freedom we enjoy and appreciate the troops who’ve helped to protect it. Just like many of us remember feeling nervous as kids, Ruby and Russell also get a little scared at the beginning of the fireworks show. But by the end, they love it. We’re close to the huge, intercoastal display, and we love watching the bright lights illuminated against the night sky and reflected on the water. At first, it’s a small sprinkle of lights. Then suddenly, they burst outward, and a wide range of colors is visible. It’s beautiful.
This makes me think of our clients. People come to us at different phases of their lives, and we are there to support them and provide guidance. If they’re sure they want to move on toward a better life, we give them the tools to get there.When someone is hesitant and isn’t certain they’re making the right choice, we urge them to try counseling. Ultimately, we take direction from our clients and are there to provide the right guidance and support. Some clients come in and are ready to begin right away. For them, we know the weight of the decision will be lifted once they complete the process, so everyone on our team gets right to work — the client lights the fuse right away! For others, the hardest part is striking the match and putting it to the fuse. Even when they acknowledge their marriage isn’t working, it’s what they know, and to some extent, it’s comfortable. It can be hard to accept the end, even when it hasn’t been a loving marriage. For these clients, verbalizing that they want a divorce and filing the papers can feel like jumping out of an airplane. There is a lot of hesitation and leadup. I recently met with one of our clients who’s in this place. She wants to move forward and start a new phase of her life in which she is no longer married. She wants to be free. But she asked us to hold off a little while on filing the divorce papers because she wants to make sure everything is settled in the other parts of her life. While she’s accepted the fact that her marriage is over, she’s still apprehensive about this next phase of her life. We understand. Divorce is a very big step and one that inevitably has unknowns, no matter how well you’ve prepared for it. At the end of the day, we give our clients the legal fireworks, matches, and instructions, and when they’re ready, they get to light them. They set off their own display. Taking that next step is up to them, and part of our job is empowering them to make their life a colorful display to remember.
For this client, her new life will begin when we file her divorce papers. That act will represent a new chapter, and it’s when her fireworks will begin.
I can’t wait to see her show. I know it’s going to be beautiful.
– Ashley Bruce
God Bless America
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Facing Reality What to Expect From Your Controlling Spouse in the Divorce It’s a harsh truth to face: The worst qualities you saw in your spouse during marriage will most likely be amplified in the divorce. If they were obsessed with money before, they may go to extremes to keep as much of it as possible. If they kept financial secrets from you during the marriage, they likely will continue to keep them, forcing you to obtain this information before the divorce. It may not be easy, but you can be ready to fight for what you need. Many of our clients are women who’ve been in an abusive marriage. Their husband has controlled and manipulated them, and they’re finally finding the strength to leave. Maybe they’re used to seeing the best in people, and maybe you are too. But if it’s time to leave, you need to be honest with yourself about your husband’s tendencies, so you can set yourself up for the divorce as best as you can. You might need to acknowledge the biggest and saddest reality: If your husband lacked the ability to care about you or others during the marriage, he’s not going to suddenly wake up and do the right thing during the divorce. You will have to accept these realities, so you can get what you need from the divorce and be able to eventually move on. Know that you are not doomed or destined for failure because your husband is a difficult person. There are strategies for dealing with people like him, and we have the resources to help you identify them. Visit BrucePA.com/divorce-info/divorcing-a- controlling-husband to learn more. If you can accept and plan for the fact that your spouse’s behavior may worsen during the divorce, you will be much more likely to get divorced sooner and on fair terms. The people who are here to help you do this will be able to account for the realities of your situation and come up with the best legal strategies to deal with your husband.
SUMMER SWIMMING SAFETY 3 TIPS FOR SWIMMING IN OPEN WATER
There’s nothing like taking a dip in a nearby pond, lake, or even the ocean. For many, it’s a summertime tradition. However, swimming in open bodies of water brings certain safety risks, as these environments are not nearly as controlled as public, club, or backyard pools. Everyone should follow these tips to have a fun and safe time cooling off under the summer sun. NEVER SWIM ALONE. When you swim in virtually any body of water, having someone there to keep an eye on you can be a lifesaver: the more people, the better. Stick to bodies of water with a professional lifeguard on duty when possible, though that’s not always an option. When swimming in open bodies of water, have a “designated spotter” to keep an eye on the swimmers. This way, you’re prepared if anything bad happens. It’s also a great idea to keep flotation devices nearby, such as life jackets, life rings, foam boards, etc. KNOW WHAT YOU’RE GETTING INTO. Sometimes, it’s next to impossible to see what’s under the surface of the water. If you are unfamiliar with a body of water, don’t jump or dive in without knowing how deep it is. If you cannot confirm what is under the surface (and the spot is not a known diving location), don’t risk it. It may be okay to swim or wade, but jumping is out of the question. Along these same lines, be VERY careful around bodies of slow-moving or standing water. These can house dangerous microbes and other contaminants that can make you ill and potentially be deadly. WATCH FOR RIP CURRENTS. These can occur at any beach without warning. They pull swimmers away from shore and are strong enough that even excellent swimmers struggle to get through them. In fact, rip currents are behind nearly 80% of beach rescues. Keep an eye on the foam at the surface of the water. If it seems to suddenly pull away from the beach, there’s a good chance a rip current is lurking beneath. If you find yourself in a rip current, it’s crucial to remain calm and avoid expending energy by swimming directly back to shore. Instead, try swimming parallel to the shore until you’re out of the current.
We will help you through this.
Is your friend or client in need of a guide as they prepare for divorce? our divorce strategy book can help! The book can be downloaded for FREE at ControlYourDifficultDivorce.com If your friend or client lives in the South Florida area, we will mail them a hard copy of the book upon request.
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Find Time
TO STRENGTHEN THE RELATIONSHIPS THAT MATTER
Of the five love languages identified by Dr. Gary Chapman, quality time may be the easiest to overlook when things get busy. However, it strengthens a relationship when two people spend time together focused solely on each other. If you and your partner, loved one, or even a friend haven’t spent much quality time together lately, this summer may be the perfect opportunity to get back to what matters. With summer comes many seasonal events and reasons to get outside and enjoy the natural beauty of Florida. For a casual Saturday spent together, grab your bikes or hiking shoes and hit one of our nearby trails, like those at Okeeheelee Park . It has more than 900 acres of land and features a Nature Center. Riverbend Park is also a great option that contains traces of Florida history, also with miles of hiking and biking trails. For a more relaxed pace, the Palm Beach Lake Trail along the intercoastal on Palm Beach is perfect.
If you need some fireworks in your life, go to the Fourth of July display at Delray Beach, which features live music, a barbecue, and fireworks, of course. Additional firework shows are also happening throughout the area this month.
During July 11–21, Shakespeare by the Sea takes place at the Seabreeze Amphitheater in Carlin Park . Come see professional actors bring the classic tales of love and loss to life. This event is free, and you can bring blankets or chairs and food and drinks to enjoy as you watch the engaging classics play out — just what you need to rekindle those feelings with the one you love. “Quality time” doesn’t have to be a big event or a fancy dinner. It’s about spending dedicated time with the person you want to deepen your relationship with. Set aside everything else and just be together.
have a LAUGH
Watermelon Cucumber Skewers
ingredients
EQUIPMENT •
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1 medium-sized watermelon, cubed
1 packet of bamboo skewers
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2 cucumbers, cut into 1/4-inch rounds
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1 block feta cheese, cubed
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1 bunch fresh mint leaves
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Salt, to taste
Directions
1. Assemble skewers by placing one watermelon cube, one cucumber round, one feta cube, and one mint leaf on skewer in that order. Repeat until skewer is full. 2. Lightly season with salt and chill in fridge until right before serving.
Inspired by CookingLight.com
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Lighting the Fireworks page 1
3 Things Everyone Needs to Know Before Swimming in Open Water A Woman’s Guide to Divorce page 2 The Value of Quality Time page 3 3 Camp Stoves for Your Next Adventure page 4
Cooking and Camping 3 Stoves for Your Next Outdoor Adventure
Whether you’re daytripping, car camping, or outright backpacking, nothing makes the wilderness feel more like home than a hot meal. Many summer fire bans put a damper on classic campfire s’mores, but a quality propane stove will let you cook up some good grub in the great outdoors. Here are some of the best units to up your camp-cooking game.
features onto this burner, and it still comes in under 3 ounces. Sure, there are lighter kits out there, but the Deluxe comes with a built-in pressure regulator for high altitudes, decent wind resistance, a push-button igniter, and excellent simmer control. Its fast boil times mean you can have multiple cups of joe prepped in under four minutes, no matter how remote your campsite.
CAMP CHEF EVEREST
BIOLITE WOOD BURNING CAMPSTOVE One of the most innovative designs on the market, this strange little stove is sure to become a favorite of backwoods adventurers and car campers alike. Leave the propane tanks at home: BioLite burns twigs and sticks you can find right around your campsite, saving you weight and money. But the special feature of this stove is it can charge electronic devices. Using patented thermoelectric technology, the BioLite converts heat from the fire into electricity, allowing anything with a USB charger to top off its battery. As electronic
This is the ultimate two burner experience. Reasonably portable for its size, this dual stovetop features best-in-class wind resistance and incredibly fast boil times. With a range that can accommodate large cook pots and finely tuned controls that make simmering a snap, you can make some incredible meals from just about anywhere. For those wishing they could just bring their actual stove along on the journey, the Camp Chef has you covered.
MSR POCKET ROCKET DELUXE For the hunters and backpackers looking to minimize weight without sacrificing their morning coffee, the latest Pocket Rocket brings the heat. MSR has managed to stack many convenient
devices become more and more common during camping trips, the added utility of this camp stove may soon prove invaluable.
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