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Lawsuits From Beyond LET’S HOPE THERE’S A COURTROOM IN THE AFTERLIFE
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No. 1 Dad Hash Browns
Inspired by Bon Appétit
We pride ourselves on being a country where everyone receives a fair trial. And while that’s not always the case, even the craziest claims still have to be heard in some capacity by a court of law. As you can imagine, this can result in plenty of spooky high jinks in the courtroom. Let’s take a look at some of the more baffling court cases in recent memory.
Ingredients
1. In a small saucepan, heat butter over medium heat until foamy. Reduce heat if needed to avoid browning. Skim off white milk solids to make clarified butter (ghee). Transfer to a bowl and reserve. (This step won’t be needed if using ghee.) 2. Using the large holes on a box grater, grate potatoes. Transfer to a large bowl of cold water and stir until water becomes cloudy. Rinse potatoes under cold water, then squeeze out liquid using cheesecloth or a kitchen towel, removing as much moisture as possible. Season potatoes. 3. In a large nonstick skillet, heat butter (or ghee) to medium-high. Add potatoes and cook until a crust forms underneath, about 5 minutes. Using a rubber spatula, break up potatoes and continue to cook, adding more butter (or ghee) if potatoes begin to stick. 4. Cook until golden brown and crisp, about 8 minutes. Drain on paper towels; season with salt, pepper, and cayenne to taste. Serve. 1 stick unsalted butter, or 6 tbsps ghee 3 russet potatoes (about 1/2 lb.), peeled 1 tsp Kosher salt, plus more to taste Freshly ground black pepper, to taste Pinch of cayenne pepper, plus more to taste Directions • • • • •
Dead Man Talking
In something straight out of a Coen Brothers movie, a New York man had to sue The New York Times on three separate occasions to get them to stop reporting that he was dead. In all fairness, it seemed like an honest mistake prolonged by the ineptitude of his public counsel and a whole lot of terrible coincidences all rolled into one. Juan Antonio Arias just so happened to share the same first and last name as one Juan Arias, who had met his untimely demise. After it was reported in a Times article, the living Arias accidentally had his own date of birth and Social Security number added to the death certificate of his now deceased namesake in a terrible mix-up from the coroner. As a result, he sued on three occasions after his lawyer missed certain deadlines to turn in proper documents. Thankfully, the issue was resolved, but not before he had his credit cards and Medicaid revoked after appearing to be dead. An unnamed New York resident — just what on earth is going on in New York? — claimed that the house they’d recently purchased was horribly and cripplingly haunted by unseen forces. The poltergeist was said to disrupt their daily activity, and the plaintiff was suing on the grounds that the home was notorious in the area for being haunted and had a reputation as such, therefore it should have been disclosed to the buyer before closing. They won. That’s right; the court ruled that the seller misled the plaintiff and should have disclosed the nature of this potentially harmful house. Shockingly enough, this type of thing is required to be disclosed when selling a house in New York. Well, at least a buyer will have peace of mind knowing that they got a sweet new pad and a ghoul for pennies on the dollar. Solemnly Spooked
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