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The Bledsoe Firm JustFamilyLaw.com | 949.363.5551 JUNE | 2020
up a whole new world including unlimited opportunities for self-improvement and for developing my talents. The success of law school and passing the bar exam led to new challenges and opportunities. O ur O wn P ersonal R eopening I n the professional self-improvement group I participate in, recently a speaker made it clear
that where you are today is a product of a lifetime of choices, habits, and decisions that you have made. It was also pointed out that we are each comfortable with our habits, decisions, and choices. Some of these habits are hard to break. If where we are in our life is not where we wanted to end up, we need to make some different choices and break some of the habits we have become comfortable with. What does your perfect life look like? What about your family life? Is it what you want it to be? It is important to write down what a perfect workday is. Even more importantly, write down what a perfect day in your life is. What is your perfect day? It will likely be different than mine. What is your perfect job? What is your perfect family situation? What do you really want your life to be in the future? Life is never going to be perfect. But we can attempt to live our best life in the areas under our control, as opposed to allowing circumstances to control us. John Lennon famously wrote, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans,” in his song "Beautiful Boy." Lots of life events happen while we are trying to figure things out. We have to determine what we want and work toward it. I married my wife in 1982. We had our first baby in 1983. I was in a job I knew was never going to work for me in the long term. It was slow moving and did not challenge me. I was 27 years old when I graduated from college. By 1987, I had two daughters and a wife to support. I decided to pursue law school and started in the fall of 1987. I did not know what type of law I would practice. But I knew I needed to take advantage of the steady, easy dead-end job I found myself in. Law school turned out to be a transformative experience for me. It opened
As the years have passed, I have been continuing to figure out life and my place in it. Our roles seem to change as we expand our families. We become parents. Time passes
away like a dream and before we know it, we become grandparents. We have unexpected health or financial challenges. We are, at times, forced to reinvent ourselves. We make course corrections in our personal lives and our work lives. At times we may be on a plateau where things are going relatively smoothly, but after a time, circumstances arise that require us to reevaluate and to make changes. Life may be really great in some aspects and quite difficult and challenging in others. Sometimes we see others who seem to have it made, and we think that if we could just reach that level of success, we could also live happily ever after. Once we get where we think we wanted to be, we find other problems to solve. As we progress in life, we sometimes find that the challenges we face are progressively more difficult and complex. Living "happily ever after" is a relative term. Back in 2003, my wife and I had six children. The first had just left for college. My practice was pretty well-established. We lived in a barely adequate home in a nice area, but we felt that we needed more space. We thought all of our problems would end if we could just get a larger home. We sold the home we were residing in and moved into our just finished, brand-new home. Unfortunately, we just replaced one set of problems with a new set. This decision to move to this larger home and its complications comprised the most difficult experience I have ever been through. It has had a profound effect on who I am today, on our family, and even my children’s relationships with each other. I will likely share what happened in an upcoming newsletter. In closing, where and who we are not only depends on our habits and decisions but also the things that happen to us beyond our control. We have all experienced a lack of control in our lives since mid-March. The next few months may be transformative in our lives as things reopen. It has been said that life after COVID-19 will never be the same and that we will do things differently. If you are looking to reinvent yourself and/or make course corrections, this may be the perfect time to implement those changes to make your lives better. —John Bledsoe
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JustFamilyLaw.com | 949.363.5551
TURN YOUR VACATION INTO A STAYCATION
with hidden clues in the dirt or bushes. The ultimate prize can be something you would have purchased on your original vacation, like a souvenir you can find online. Create a ‘Family Museum’ Many vacations include an educational aspect in order to enrich our understanding of the place we’re visiting, and museums are a great way to accomplish that. If you’re confined to the house, then teach your kids about your own knowledge and interests and encourage them to get creative and make their own contributions, too. Have everyone create art, take photos, or write about their prized possessions. Display these masterpieces around your home and let their creators take you on a tour. Learning more about one another builds meaningful bonds. Bring Your Trip Home You probably chose your original vacation destination in order to experience new and different cultures and activities. But just because you’re no longer traveling to that location doesn’t mean you can’t experience some of what it has to offer! Research popular local cuisine, activities, and history of the area, then create ways to experience them with your family. Cook a traditional meal, recreate a scenic location through photographs, or share a story about local lore and history. Your changed plans will no longer feel like a missed opportunity. Staying at home doesn’t mean your family can’t have the fun of a vacation. All it takes is a little creativity and innovation to build an experience that will bring your family closer together.
3 Ways to Replace a Canceled Vacation
In the vast majority of cases, the court has a policy of noninterference and respects the rights of parents to decide which family members they allow to see their children. That said, there are rare circumstances where the court may intervene through laws that protect grandparent’s rights and allow for grandparent visitation against the wishes of the children’s legal parents or guardians. In an ideal situation, grandparents have a positive relationship with the parents of their grandchildren and this allows them to see their grandchildren without intervention from the family court system. However, in some cases, the relationship between the grandparents and the legal parents of children breaks down and the parents do not allow the grandparents to continue the regular contact and visitation they previously enjoyed. In some of these cases, the grandparents are able to demand their rights and obtain reasonable visitation through the family court system. In order for this to happen, there must be a preexisting relationship that has created a bond between grandparent and grandchild. This means that when there is no preexisting relationship (such as a grandparent who has been estranged from the parents as long as the child has been alive), Vacations provide opportunities for families to spend time together in a relaxed environment, get away from the routines of everyday life, and create meaningful memories. If you’ve recently had to cancel a trip but still want to create the experience of a vacation for your family, then a staycation is just what you need. Transform Your Backyard When you’re trying to recreate a vacation, the outdoor areas of your home present a variety of possibilities. You can turn a sandbox into a relaxing beach, complete with a kiddie pool “ocean.” If you have trees, then set up a zip line or obstacle course. You can even stimulate summer brains with a scavenger hunt around the backyard H ow D ivorce I mpacts G randkids and G randparents Grandparents’ Rights
grandparents will not be able to claim rights to visitation. The court must also find that granting visitation rights to the grandparent is in the child’s best interest.
In some families, grandparents find themselves raising their grandchildren when the child’s parents are absent or unavailable. For example, the child’s biological parent(s) may be dealing with drug addiction or incarceration. Grandparents in this circumstance should consult an attorney about establishing legal guardianship. Our firm is experienced and prepared to help grandparents in any of these situations. If you’re a grandparent with questions about your rights, then call us at 949.363.5551 to learn more.
For more informative articles like this one, be sure to visit our blog at JustFamilyLaw.com/family-law-expert-blog!
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JustFamilyLaw.com | 949.363.5551
W ord S earch Summer
LEARN SOMETHING NEW WITH THESE 6 YOUTUBE CHANNELS
Barbecue Sunshine Gemini Father’s Day Beach Hot Pearl Rose Solstice
YouTube is an educational powerhouse. When you have a few minutes to spare on any given day, you can learn something new in a matter of minutes. Whether you’re waiting for an appointment or waiting for a pot of water to boil, you can get more out of these spare moments.
Grill Pride
YouTube is packed with a remarkable selection of accessible content that blends education, entertainment, and insight into the world around us. In those few extra minutes a day, take a look at one or all of these channels and prepare to learn something new! Engineering Explained (YouTube.com/user/EngineeringExplained) Don’t know much about cars? Engineering Explained is a great place to start your education. Learn about specific vehicle makes and models or how specific components function. The next time an automotive question comes up, you’ll likely find the answer here. Google Small Business (YouTube.com/user/GoogleBusiness) Google is a tool used by many businesses to market online and create marketing strategies. On this channel, you’ll learn how to use tools like AdWords and search to their maximum potential. You’ll also find hundreds of other practical business-related tips as well. Healthcare Triage (YouTube.com/user/TheHealthcareTriage) Discover the latest in health care and medicine in short five-minute bites. This channel isn’t afraid to tackle topics other media sources might skip. Healthcare Triage also includes longer 20- to 30-minute live shows, where host Dr. Aaron Carroll answers viewer questions. Howcast (YouTube.com/user/Howcast) If there is something you want to learn how to do, then Howcast has you covered. This channel delivers quick yet comprehensive explanations for everything from fitness techniques to building stronger relationships. Kurzgesagt – In a Nutshell (YouTube.com/user/Kurzgesagt) This channel covers a wide variety of topics — from bees to space — all using colorful animations. This channel has more limited content than a lot of others, as they only post about once a month, but the remarkable accessibility of the content more than makes up for it. Make (YouTube.com/user/makemagazine) Learn to do it yourself! This channel offers tutorials on subjects that range from simple computer programming to woodworking. It emphasizes the learning aspect of each project and its everyday practicality.
WATERMELON & TOMATO SALAD WITH TURMERIC OIL
Inspired by BonAppetit.com
This light summer salad is packed with flavor and color!
INGREDIENTS
watermelon, diced into 1/2-inch pieces
• 1/4 cup virgin coconut oil • 1 tsp peppercorns, coarsely crushed • 1 tsp coriander seeds, coarsely crushed • 1/2 tsp cumin seeds • 1/2 tsp ground turmeric • 4 cups seedless
• 2 medium heirloom
tomatoes, diced into 1/2- inch pieces • 8 oz mild feta, diced into 1/2-inch pieces • Flaked sea salt
DIRECTIONS
1. In a small saucepan, heat coconut oil, peppercorns, coriander seeds, cumin seeds, and turmeric for about 3 minutes or until fragrant. Let cool slightly but do not let coconut oil solidify. 2. In a large bowl, place diced watermelon, tomatoes, and feta. Drizzle with oil mixture and finish with a dash or two of salt.
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JustFamilyLaw.com | 949.363.5551
PRST STD US POSTAGE PAID BOISE, ID PERMIT 411
JustFamilyLaw.com | 949.363.5551
23101 Lake Center Drive • Suite 310 Lake Forest, CA 92630
Inside
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Our Own Personal Reopening
3 Enriching Staycation Ideas
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Grandparents — What Are Your Rights When it Comes to Your Grandkids?
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YouTube Channels That Help You Learn Something New
Watermelon and Tomato Salad With Turmeric Oil
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Help Local Nonprofits in Challenging Times
THE BEST WAYS TO HELP LOCAL NONPROFITS IN CHALLENGING TIMES
Over the past several months, families, businesses, and nonprofits have had to navigate life in this challenging “new normal,” and it can be hard to support your favorite nonprofits when times are tough. Here are a few ways you can help these important entities, even when you don’t have resources to spare right now.
especially when your budget may be tight. Instead, consider cleaning out your closet. What clothes, shoes, or other accessories can you part with? What about dishware or small appliances? When you clean out your home and donate unused items, you benefit those in the community who need them most.
up donations or ingredients from donors and to deliver food to people in need, such as the elderly or those with disabilities.
Advocate
Even if you don’t have time or resources to give, you can become an advocate for important causes around your community. While it might not seem like much, sharing information about local nonprofits on social media can make a genuine difference. Nonprofits need exposure, which is greatly boosted through community support. Sharing useful information about nonprofits — or sharing their posts — increases their visibility so more people will take action.
Donate
Volunteer
While many people donate generously during the holiday season, remember that nonprofits need donations throughout the year, and different nonprofits need different things. A monetary donation can often go a long way, but never feel obligated to give money,
In a time of social distancing, volunteering may be discouraged, but nonprofits still need volunteers to operate. The good news is that many nonprofits need volunteers for positions that maintain social distance, such as driving. Food banks and kitchens need drivers to pick
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