them what they’ve already heard about the topic and go from there. Ages 11–13 (Tweens) What if my child mentions self-harm? How do I know if they’re joking? When should I worry? At this stage, parents should familiarize themselves with the warning signs and ways to help emotional regulation. Check online influences and peer pressure, but make sure your child knows they are loved and can receive help. Ages 14–18 (Teens) Parents of teens know that emotions are complicated and understanding them can be even more difficult. Questions like, “Should I ask directly if they’re thinking about suicide?” or “What if they say yes?” can float around. Here, some experts recommend asking directly and calmly. Listen without judgement. Take every mention seriously and seek professional help immediately if needed. College Age/Young Adults Your child has probably moved out of the house at this stage—how can you tell if they’re struggling? How often should you check in? What if they stop responding? Show interest and be supportive. Be direct, and ask them if they are considering suicide or have a plan. Don’t be judgemental, give advice, or try to talk them out of suicide (and don’t swear to secrecy). WHAT TO DO NOW? Say you’ve approached your child directly about where they are at mentally. You’ve taken an important first step! Here are some questions to ask your child: How have you been feeling lately? I’ve noticed you’ve been down; can you tell me more about that? It seems like you’ve been sad more often. Did something happen at school? Sometimes when people are feeling the way you are, they think about suicide— have you ever had those thoughts before? What not to say: • “You have nothing to be sad about.” • “Other kids have it worse.” • “You’re just looking for attention.” • “Don’t be dramatic.” Instead, say: • “I’m glad you told me.” • “I’m here with you.” • “We’re going to figure this out together.”
The following warning signs, provided by the Nationwide Children’s Hospital, indicate that a youth is severely depressed or at risk for suicide and should be responded to immediately : • Talking to others or posting on social media about: suicide or wanting to die or feeling hopeless, trapped, or like they are “a burden” to others • Looking for ways to kill themselves by gathering medications, sharp objects, or firearms or searching online for ways to end their life • Expressing unbearable emotional pain • Visiting, calling, or reaching out to people to say “goodbye” • Giving away prized possessions • Suddenly becoming calm or cheerful after a long period of depression The following warning signs indicate that a youth may be struggling with depression, which requires evaluation by a mental health professional: • Feeling sad or irritable more often than not • Sleeping or eating more or less than usual • Showing little to no interest in activities • Withdrawing from others • Participating in reckless behavior that is out of character • Engaging in self-injurious behavior Apart from the signs, there are also some risk factors that may make some people more vulnerable to suicide that families and parents should keep in mind. According to Child Mind Institute, a family history of suicide, bullying, and access to things like firearms and pills can all be factors that may put a child at risk. KNOWING THE AGE DIFFERENCE Ages 3–6 Can young children understand death? Should you mention suicide to them? What if they overhear adults talking? How honest should I be? Questions like that are asked by parents all the time. Experts advise to use simple language when talking to young children and avoid euphemisms like “went to sleep.” Make sure to reassure children that they are safe, and encourage questions. Ages 7–10 Kids this age may hear about suicide at school, on YouTube, or from classmates. Parents might have questions like: What if my child hears about suicide at school? How much detail should I give? Can talking about suicide plant the idea? Experts say that talking about suicide does not increase suicide thoughts, and that it’s important to correct misinformation. Ask
Another great step is to create a safety plan. After expressing thoughts of suicide, creating a plan with your child for those days that they’re having suicidal thoughts or feeling sad and lonely can be important. Take practical safety measures like removing access to guns, conducting room checks, and leaving the door, but also make sure to look for ways to lean into the things that they love or even avoid things that aren’t helpful. If your child has never been to therapy, but is open to the idea, this could be a great time to start! While having conversations at home will help you better understand where your child is at, a licensed therapist who specializes in child psychiatry and mental health can help make sense of your child’s emotions and work one-on-one with your family. Not quite ready for this step? That’s okay! Speaking to a pediatrician or a primary care provider can be another great step for navigating where your child is at and accessing helpful resources in your area. PREVENTION & RESOURCES By educating ourselves, we can learn what puts kids at the greatest risk for suicide and what protects them most strongly. Awareness of risk factors and warning signs, making ourselves available, and practicing assisting children in the awareness that help is always available are key roles in building a child’s mental health. Parents should seek immediate help if a child: • Talks about wanting to die or kill themselves • Has a plan or access to lethal means • Gives away possessions or says goodbye • Expresses hopelessness or feeling like a burden • Shows sudden, dramatic behavioral changes after a period of depression If someone is in immediate danger, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department. Anyone experiencing emotional distress or concerned about someone else can also contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 for immediate support. Parents don’t need to have perfect answers. They simply need to be willing to ask hard questions, listen without judgment, and remind their children that they never have to face life’s hardest moments alone. Conversations about suicide can feel overwhelming—but they can also be the first step towards hope and healing.
NOLAFAMILY.COM | SEPTEMBER 2026 25
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