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where you want to go, and that is by changing the association of what change means to you. The best way I can describe what I mean about changing the association is to relate it to something that happens in many peo- ple’s lives. Even if you don’t have any bad habits or addictions, the gift you can give someone else from the tips in this section are powerful and proven to support a healthy lifestyle. Breaking a habit, starting a good one, or ending an addiction can all happen when you change the association of what that thing means to you. Let me give you an example of someone I helped quit smok- ing. A young lady of 26 had been smoking since high school, just like her mother and grandmother had. She said she wanted to quit, but found it hard because, she said, “I gain weight when I try to quit, and I get headaches. Besides, smoking helps ease stress for me.” I remember wanting to yell out, “Relieves stress! You’re right. It relieves stress because it may kill you!” But I would never say that because I knew that, at that point, those were truly her beliefs and associations about smoking. Tobacco is one of the most addictive drugs on the planet. So many people who smoke attach certain meanings to it, whether those meanings are true or not. This young lady had associated smoking to being thin, no headaches, and a relief of stress. Her association to cigarettes was all good for continuing smoking and all bad for quitting. I didn’t lecture her at all. I just said, “Even though you brush it off, I know you are aware that smoking causes death. And typi- cally it’s not a pleasant death, right? So, let’s say 25 years from now, you are in the hospital, dying of lung cancer. In pain. Tubes up your nose. I.V. in your arm, and gasping for air. Your family is around, and they don’t want you to go. As harsh as it sounds, can you picture it?” She said, “Yes.” “What if a genie appeared at your bed side and granted you one wish? What would that wish be?” She immediately replied, “To live!”
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