My Idols aren't formal religious idols, but there's not a day where I don't give myself to idolatry. Maybe it's wanting the world to live according to my schedule. Maybe it's wanting to be affirmed as being right. Maybe it's comfort, control, pleasure, respect, appreciation, something gets me and I began to weep as I thought, "My everyday street-level idols are just as vomitous to God as that idol was to me that afternoon." And as I was in my car, all I could pray was "God help me, God help me, God help me". Wouldn't that be a wonderful thing for your child to quit debating with you, for him or her to begin to think, "God, help me. I get it wrong again and again and again. I again and again put myself in Your position. I again and again serve things other than You and it creates dissatisfaction and frustration and conflict in my life." Parents, give the Spirit of God an opportunity to work in the hearts of your children by connecting character to worship. That's the connection because as I said earlier, you've given birth to a worshiper. This child, in every moment of life, is serving something because that's how he's been hardwired. Everything that child does, everything that child says is somehow, someway an expression of worship. And when I worship God, then I value what God says is valuable. I love what God loves, and I do what God's called for me to do. I think we talk about spirituality as if it's some item outside of our normal everyday life. You live your spirituality every day. You live it in the hallways and bathrooms and bedrooms and family rooms and kitchens and vans of everyday life. And so you want to be making that connection that's a connection your child will never make. That's wonderful, biblical information that they need to have that they will not have without your teaching. SESSION 8 Well, what are your tools? Instruction. Grab those God-given moments to instruct. Maybe you're having nasty sort of selfishness at the supper table. Instead of saying, "You say that again, you're going to leave the table. I don't care how hungry you are, you'll learn," how about saying, "Let's just stop. Everybody put down your utensils. Let's talk. What's going on here?" It's a great moment. "Why is it so important to you now that the piece of meat you got is three centimeters smaller than your sister's? Why? Let's talk about that." And so this child is actually becoming wise. Instruction. Correction. In moments of discipline, correction is not only announcing what is wrong, but talking about what is right. What is it that God wants for me here? What would have been a better way here? Let's talk about that. This is a moment of opportunity. Talk about a better way. If this is not what I should have desired, what should I desire in this moment? Entreaty. Entreaty is to plead. Plead with your children for a heart that is right. Plead with them about the danger of idolatry. It doesn't hurt for your child to see you a bit tender and emotional. Jesus looked at the crowd and He saw sheep without a shepherd, distressed and scattered. And the Bible says He wept. He said, "Oh, Jerusalem, Jerusalem, when are you going to get it?" That tenderness is powerful. Be tender. Example. Talk about your own struggles. It may be great for you to talk about how time is too important to you. Say, "Last night, you know, dad was really uptight. I tend to make schedule way too important. And we were three, two minutes late, it really didn't make any difference." And then you say, "That's all of our struggle. We tend to make things way more important than they actually are and then we get ourselves all uptight in the process. It's great talk. Be humble. Be a living example of the struggle and God's rescue. It's a beautiful thing. It's very, very dangerous for you to hold before your children a character standard that they know well you're not keeping. To call for patience when you're impatient, to call for love when you're unloving, to call for willing service when you just like to bark orders. That creates confusion and the beginning of bitterness in the heart of your child because of that double standard.
Transcript: Session 8
GETTING TO THE HEART OF PARENTING
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