It is still not too late to make predictions for
rain throughout the two-day event. Some
2011, is it? Good. So let us dust off the crystal
people will say it is the worst rainfall they
ball, pump up the prescient skill set and
have ever seen. Large volumes of La Bouette
attempt to anticipate what will be making
will be consumed. In October, Don Boudria
headlines in our part of the world over the
will take his band on the road in an effort to
next year. Remember that these forecasts are
drum up support for Glengarry-Prescott-
written with tongue in cheek, so take them
Russell Liberal candidate Julie Bourgeois. The
with a grain of salt while keeping in mind that
group will have its own theme song — GPR
sodium is not good for you. Here goes.
Trilogy. It will begin with the line: “There was
Stranger things have happened
In January, in an effort to shake off the
a time in this fair land when Liberals always
winter blues and to justify looming tax hikes,
won....” In November, a new health study
will begin. Spectators will gag at the stench;
municipal councils in the Far East of Ontario
usually only visit Vankleek Hill for the
will show that people in Eastern Ontario drink
large volumes of La Bouette will be consumed.
will encourage the populace to drop by
Demolition Derby at the Fair, will volunteer
too much beer and eat too much cheese but
The federal government will provide funds to
depression levels have dropped off. In
municipal buildings to see what is going on
to sample the experimental batches. To ensure
assess the long-term socio-economic impact a
December, the Comité 100 jours in
during “open houses.” All municipalities in
no laws are broken, the tasters will be loaded
Hawkesbury will conclude an internal study
community can suffer after having discussed
the region say they will participate. Most do,
onto buses and transported to and from the
on transparency. The report will remain
the same issue, over and over again, for the
however, the town of Hawkesbury, which
brewery. The special brew, La Bouette, will
confidential. So, there you have some of the
past 28 years. The Glengarry Highland Games
fears any spontaneous contact with taxpayers,
have a woody aroma and an after-taste that
items that may be getting your attention in
in Maxville will be another huge success. The
will delay its open house until officials have
actually gets better when healthy portions of
2011. Remember, before you start firing off e-
federal government will fund a study into the
time to set out guidelines to ensure “decorum”
poutine are ingested. The Eastern Ontario
mails, that these predictions are not to be
effects of long-time exposure to bagpipe music.
is maintained. The open houses will be a big
Health Unit will not be amused. An April
taken too seriously, however, as they say,
In September, a Summer Festival will begin
hit. To draw more people to their facilities,
Fool’s Day gag will go viral when pranksters
reality is often more fascinating than fiction
at Place des Pionniers in Hawkesbury. It will
municipalities will hold lotteries. One lucky
post on Facebook a story that Alfred College
and anything can happen.
winner will get the chance to drive a snow
will become the Alfred E. Neuman College.
plow and knock over one mail box; the second-
The hilarity will peak when some Mad
C’est payant de perdre du poids!
prize winner will get to ride in a fire truck; the
Magazine nuts converge on the agricultural
third-prize winner will visit a sewage plant;
college. They will be herded off on La Bouette
OBTENEZ UNE REMISE EN ARGENT 11$ par livre! Résultats garantis.
fourth-prize winner will be forced to visit two
Bus to Beau’s. In May, a huge traffic jam will
sewage plants; the fifth-prize winner will be
clog Alexandria’s Main Street as people flock
« Grâce à Herbal Magic, je sens que j’ai retrouvé ma vie! Je suis heureuse, j’ai confiance en moi et j’ai retrouvé goût à la vie! »
forced to attend a united counties council
to the town to gawk at the construction of all
meeting. In February, the Hawkesbury long-
the new commercial buildings. At the same
term plan committee, Le Comité 100 jours du
time, hordes will be travelling the rural routes
plan d’affaire visionnaire et stratégique (honest,
of the Far East seeking solar panels. The Eastern
Nancy a perdu 191 livres et 179 pouces. et 22 tailles de vêtements*
that is what it is called) will convene a special
Ontario Health Unit will issue a warning
meeting to discuss the open houses everyone
about bugs, bears, and gawking. Jean-Marc
else held in January. There will be a big
Lalonde will announce that he will not seek
snowstorm. People will swear it is the worst
re-election as Glengarry-Prescott-Russell’s
blizzard that they have ever seen. Because
M.P.P. He will launch his campaign for the
they have nothing better to do, former
mayoralty in Clarence-Rockland. In June, as
members of Hawkesbury council will begin
part of a campaign to counter the devastation
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attending council meetings, using question
of deforestation, the united counties of
period to poke fun at the current members. In
Prescott-Russell will embark on a tree-planting
March, Hawkesbury’s economic development
crusade. Tree nurseries will boom; sales of
department will convince Beau’s All Natural
blister cream will soar. In July, Hawkesbury
Brewing Company of Vankleek Hill to concoct
Mayor René Berthiaume will get a gong to
*Notre clientèle est variée, tout comme ses résultats. *Offre valide pour les services personnalisés en perte de poids pour nouveaux contracts d’un an. Ne peut être jumelé à d’autre coupons, spéciaux ou promotions. Doit d’abord satisfaire aux critères d’admissibilité pour être accepté dans un programme. Le coût des produits est en sus et est à prix régulier. Offre valide jusqu’au 30 janvier 2011. © 2010 / 2011Herbal Magic. Tous droits réservés.
a brew inspired by the Ottawa River and the
control the crowds lined up at the lectern
former Canadian International Paper mill in
during question period. In August, the
herbalmagic.ca
town. Thousands of Hawkesburgers, who
decontamination of the former CIP lagoon
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