Whisler Law Firm - May 2020

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Help Your Child Grieve Losing Senior Year

HELP YOUR HIGH SCHOOL SENIOR COPE WITH THE LOSS SENIOR YEAR CUT SHORT?

The COVID-19 pandemic has impacted the world in unexpected ways. In an effort to prevent the spread of the coronavirus, many schools across the country closed before spring break and will remain closed through the end of the school year. While teachers and administrators work hard to make sure students maintain their academic progress through online education, cutting the school year short has meant that many high school seniors are being robbed of the traditions and rites of passage that come with senior year.

So how can parents help their children cope with this grief? Start by asking them what they need. As a parent, you may feel the impulse to “fix” the situation with a backyard family prom or a graduation ceremony via Zoom, but now is not the time for surprises. Your child is working through loss, and everyone grieves in different ways. Bethany Raab, a licensed clinical social worker who specializes in treating adolescents, advises parents to open the door for conversation but not to force the subject.

“Don’t give too much advice just yet,” Raab recommends. “We really don’t know enough to give long-term advice at this point.”

It’s also important for parents to recognize their own grief during this time. Many parents look forward to celebrating these milestones with their children, so missing these experiences can be traumatic for parents too. It’s okay to acknowledge your own loss and disappointment, but avoid projecting your feelings onto your child. We cannot take back the experiences stolen by COVID-19, but as parents, we can be there for our kids and help them work through this uncertain time. And remember, no matter what happens, you can still mark the occasion with a nice graduation present.

In the face of illness and growing unemployment, not being able to walk across a stage to collect a diploma can sound like a trivial matter to some adults. But if you’re the parent of a high school senior, it’s important to acknowledge what your student has lost. The graduation ceremony, prom, senior skip day, and even that last school lunch with friends are all wonderful life events that many students look forward to for years. Along with this loss, they are grappling with an uncertain future.

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