757
November 1927
T h e
K i n g ' s
B u s i n e s s
:F O R YOUR CHRISTMAS GIFT L IST ;
“Cheerful Chaff” T HE Bible is not the only book that is suffering at- the hands of modern revisers. Even some of our time- honored proverbs are undergoing radical changes. Here are a few which we have noticed: The early mass catches the Sunday golf player. The fool and his joke are soon started. Everything comes to him who orders hash. If at first you don’t succeed, cry, cry again (recom mended for wives). No backbone is stronger than its weakest vertebra (chiropractic version). A sock on the foot is worth two on the jaw. Laugh and the world laughs with you; snore and you sleep alone. It is better to' have loved a short man than never to have loved a tall. People who live near gas houses should not throw matches. Time, tide and auto trucks wait for no man. Many a true word is spoken through false teeth. Early to bed and early to rise, and your girl goes out with other guys. A rolling pin gathers no husbands. There’s many a slip ’twixt the head and the pillow. A friend in need is a friend who feeds. Nothing succeeds like sexes. A stitch behind saves a laugh from nine. The Lord helps find those who help themselves. Marry in haste and repeat at pleasure. Distance makes the heart grow fonder (radio version). Where there’s a road there’s a detour (autoists’ ver sion). Children should be seen and not hurried. If the shoe fits, put it in your pipe and smoke it. Sufficient unto the day is the drivel thereof. What fools these mortals think other mortals be! Fools rush in where wise men refuse to wed, A brain is only as strong as its weakest think. Look before you lip. A nose should be seen and not heard. You can lead a band to music, but you can’t make them play. The wages of gin is death. A word to the wife is insufficient. He who laughs last has told the joke. He who courts and does not wed has to come to court instead. Charles Brent says: “The vision of God unseals the lips of man. Herein lies strength for conflict with the common enemy of the praying world, known as wandering thoughts. If the eye is fixed on God, thought may roam where it will without irreverence, for every thought is then converted into a prayer. “Some have found it a useful thing when their minds have wandered off from devotion and been snared by some good, but irrelevant consideration, not to cast away the offending thought as the eyes are again lifted to the Divine Face, but to take it captive, carry it into the presence of God and weave it into a prayer before putting it aside and resuming the original topic. This is to lead captivity captive.” F ixing th e Eye On God “I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills”
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