of advancing a conversation without listening. You could be doing fantasy football or something. And so your wife actually thinks you’re interested, and so she launches into the conversation. Now here’s actually what you’re hearing, (gobble-de-gook; gobble-de-gook; gobble-de-gook) she stops. You haven’t heard a word, and you say, “And what happened next?” You didn’t even hear what happened before! Now, she’s excited; she thinks that you’re actually listening, so she goes (gobble-de-gook; gobble-de-gook; gobble-de-gook; gobble- de-gook; gobble-de-gook). She stops again, and you say, “And how did that make you feel?” You can keep this going for a while. You’re not actually standing there, men, and this is sad, and thinking, “I don’t care what the conversation is; I don’t care how long it takes; I am deeply committed to this woman; I love her dearly; if it’s important to her, it’s important to me. I love her; I’m in this conversation all the way.” You’re not thinking that because, at that moment, that’s not what’s ruling your heart. Sad, guys, it’s sad. There are men in this room, if your wife comes to you on a Friday night, and she says, “I have an activity planned for us tomorrow morning.” You’re disappointed because the reality is, on a Saturday morning, you’d rather spend three hours with your golf clubs, your fly rod, your shotgun, or your tennis racket than you would with your wife. And she says, “I’ve discovered just outside of Hershey (PA) is the world’s largest flea market. There are 70,000 vendors, and they all have good stuff. We can just walk the aisles together.” You see, your marriage is always being enhanced by, or victimized by, what you treasure. SESSION 6 You see, your marriage is always being enhanced by, or victimized by, what you treasure. What’s happening in your marriage? Where is what’s important to you, where is what’s a treasure to you, harming this relationship? A desire for a good thing becomes a bad thing when that desire becomes a ruling thing--what’s affectively, functionally ruling your heart, and what’s it doing to your marriage? Or let me say it this way, “Be honest! What do you really want for your marriage?” A marriage that pleases God is of great benefit to both people--or you’re determined to turn this man into a romantic man that you’ve always wanted. Or, you’re determined you will have a wife who will live graciously with all your man-toys. What is it that you’re after? What is it that you want? What is your treasure, and what is it doing to your marriage? Your marriage is always enhanced by, or victimized by, what you treasure. Now Jesus uses two categories in this passage that I think are very helpful, and I want to unpack them with you. The first one we’ve played with a little bit, but I want to put it the way Jesus puts it. It’s, earth-bound treasures, earth-bound treasures. Those are all the physical locations, experiences, and possessions of everyday life, earth-bound treasure. And Jesus says, “Don’t live for earth-bound treasure. Don’t make those the most important thing that shapes your life.” And as He says that, He says, “Don’t you understand that moths eat them; rust destroys them; thieves steal them?” Why is He saying that? Well, He wants us to know that earth- bound treasures are always impermanent. And why does he want us to know that they are impermanent? Hear what I’m going to say; this is helpful for your marriage—“Because earth-bound treasurers have no capacity whatsoever to satisfy your heart. They can’t satisfy your heart; they can’t satisfy your heart; and while you’re pursuing things that will never satisfy your heart, the significant important things of life are left neglected.” You know what the number one reason marriages fail is, do you know? It’s not adultery; its neglect. The number one reason marriages fail is neglect because long before there is adultery, neglect has already taken place. Listen, you cannot have a marriage in this fallen world and leave it neglected. Think of what a Biblical view of marriage is. It’s a flawed person married to a flawed person, in a fallen world (Are you encouraged yet?) but with a faithful God. So when you have a flawed person not yet complete because God is still at work, married to a flawed person not yet complete because God’s at work, living in the temptation and stresses of a fallen world, you cannot neglect that marriage. You cannot leave it alone; you must constantly work on your marriage. And when you’re in constant pursuit of earth-bound treasure, because you think somehow those earth-bound treasures will satisfy your heart, meanwhile your marriage is not getting the kind of attention that it’s supposed to get. There are people in this room--you’ve loaded your schedule so much in pursuit of so many things; you don’t even have time for a marriage. You have no time.
Transcript: Session 6
WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?
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