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Dispatches from the Highlands
News from CannaTown NOV-DEC 2021
Vol 8. Edition 6
$4.20 Cents
HOLIDAYSPUSHEDBACKABOUT2MONTHS LACKOF GOODS, NATIONAL INTEREST, SINK ANNUAL FESTIVITIES "People just aren't really into
JimJams SupplyChain Lost Port Keys, Page 6 Local and national teams have dis- patched to the area near Cannafor- nia's biggest port to search. See Lost Port Keys .....................Page 6 Dudeflation Coming Broconomy, Page 8 A sudden upturn in dude supply has triggered the start of dudeflation, a possible threat to the broconomy. See Broconomy.............. ............Page 8 EmployerMandatesTests Drug Tests, Page 9 Amajor local employer will require posi- tive drug tests going forward . See Drug Tests ............................Page 9 Industry Updates National&Local, Page 16 Local Field Guide PurchaseRules, Page 26 Presents The Green Solution
Fezertz's Truedatyo Here Social Media, Page 10 Stiggy Fezertz has launched a compet- itor to Twitter that looks suspiciously like Twitter with a new logo. See Social Media... ...................Page 10 50 Years of Teaser Album Notes, Page 14 New albums, old albums -- they’re all game as Erickson takes on the soundtrack to your chill. See Album Notes. ..................Page 14 Essential Muffins CousinDRecipe, Page 15 Savor for yourself or be the life of the party! Cooking with THC made easy. See Recipe ................................Page 15
********* A holiday scene sits vacant as friends and family choose to post- pone things this year 'til the vibe is a little better - full story pg B17 thewholepresents andcaroling thing this year. Evenwithbud."
WeeklyCannaScopes See Fortunes, Page 7
I'm a Pyromancer! Hugh Jollydab, Page 12 CannaSaver TM Today’s Coupons feature: Terrapin Care Station Denver/Boulder Page 129 High Level Health Denver/Dumont Page 85
** CannaCritiques Section Pg 51 ** DENVER & BOULDER CANNABIS LISTINGS Addresses, Phone by Categories: Dispensaries . . . . . . . . . . 25 Cannabis Clubs . . . . . . . . 45 Doctors . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47 Kratom/Herbal . . . . . . . . 47 Hemp/CBD . . . . . . . . . . . 48 Glass Shops . . . . . . . . . . 49 Grow Stores . . . . . . . . . . 69
COVER: KURT VONNEGUT Collector's Edition CounterCulture Series Stories @ Cannapag.es/covers Drawn by Justin Redmon RedRevoltDesign.com
House of Dankness Denver Page 89
21+ Tourist? Recreational Shops Listings on Page 27! FIRST-TIME SPECIALS LIST pg 18 **** SAVE BIGWITHCOUPONS pg 71
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Dispatches from the Highlands
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Cannatown News
SupplyChainTotallyShutDownDueToJim As a backlog of cargo ships in Cannafornia’s southern port reached a historic high this week, the supply chain crisis overwhelming the country’s busiest port complex turns out to be the fault of Jim, assistant manager and last man with the keys to the container yard. Jim is, and has been, scouring his home and tracing his steps for any sign of the facility keychain that he reportedly lost roughly a month ago, on the walk home from work while smaking a caviar blunt. It was the only key to the port. OnThursday more than 420 cargo ships were still waiting to unload shit-tons of containers outside the port in Los Ganjales. The backlog continues to sit idle in the water, expecting to create a holiday bottleneck that will likely prevent all sorts of goods from hash to toothpaste, from entering the country even until next summer. The entire infrastructure and failure, are on Jim. “We even had a copy of the key, which he lost at the laundromat just a couple days prior to the incident,” said freight manager State and national leaders have pledged to expand the search for the keys, mounting chains of arm-locked volunteers, scouring the sidewalks and byways between the port’s employee lounge, and Jim’s house fifteen blocks away. Locksmiths have been called in, however, most of those specializing in non-electrical retrofit sys- tems are unable to leave their nursing homes for extended periods of time. Jim has also ransacked his house 15 times to no avail. “These issues affect everyone all the way from the person on the boat to the buyer at the end. This affects anyone who wants to smake their explosive Phnom Penh, or get new hand-crafted mountain vapes, or use basic stuff like food and undies and designer presswood furniture,” said Pete Budder, transportation secretary. “Fudge Jim. I’m just saying what’s on everyone’s minds. I’m sure he’s a nice person, but you know, fudge him.” OTHER HEADLINES Peace treaty disrupted by sudden, unrelenting flatulence Unknown diplomat sinks progress, iced clams blamed pg 150 Facebook changes name to ShittyOldFartShtick pg 157 Billionaires in space now national epidemic pg 166 NFT's: World's starving ask "WTF?" pg 171 **Brought to you by Stinky Shady Creek Nursing Home** “Where the smell of the creek keeps you alive.” Rhoda Miles. “I told them he would lose it again.” “He’s lost every key he’s ever held,” she added.
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Vol 8. Edition 6
News from CannaTown
Page 7
Libra - The leaf-blower bong was a nice weekend novelty, but you shouldn't have brought it along to ski. Scorpio - Nobody’s cried so much when they hurled before, but then, nobody’s eaten a party-sized Oreos that fast before. Sagittarius - The lady watching you at the gym isn't admiring your squats. She's consid- ering calling you an ambulance. Capricorn - You’re not sure what "gimmicky charisma" your grandmother is talking about, but she sure holds it against you. Aquarius - As the zombie lunges to sink its jaws into your shoulder, you’ll realize it’s only an trenchcoat hanging on a mopstick. Pisces - As you snap out of your daze, you'll understand that this one joint is the only thing keeping you from yelling at everyone like Schwarzenegger in Kindergarten Cop .
CANNASCOPES : Discover Your Fortune! Aries - The first date would've gone well, if your allergy to bird-watching hadn't kicked in. Taurus - It’s cold outside, but then, it’s cold inside too. Because you spent the utility bill money on a satchel and it was totally worth it. Gemini - Your landlord wasn't happy when you brought a cow in the house, so you prob- ably shouldn't tell him it's stuck in the attic. Cancer - It was a night to remember at the opera. Nobody could figure out how you got on stage, much less, into that tiny leotard. Leo - Eyes off your phone and pay more atten- tion to life! Specifically, it's your turn to puff puff pass, and you're holding up the circle. Virgo - The gravity in here is terrible, you'll think, before tumbling head-first into the trampoline with half-roasted blunt in hand.
What Came to Pass News in Brief
90% of Kush in Kushington held by 10% Kushington, the lavish suburb north of Can- natown, is well-known for its vast gardens of dank kush, particularly the banana kush variety. But a new think tank study reveals that roughly 90% of crops are actually owned by only 10% of the local population. "This inequality of stash will continue until nothing is left for the lowest cadets. A revolution, or, anarchy, is around the corner," warns the article, published by the Council of Unem- ployed PhD's. The situation has created what some call a "Banana Kush Republic," despite relativey democratic society. "The main prob- lem is that a certain half of the electorate votes for people who actually sign a contract not to raise cannabis taxes on the rich, so this situa- tion is not likely to change anytime soon," the report concludes. "Also, the general populace is so stoned all the time, the rich influence can happen in broad daylight and nobody cares."
Arnie Caught in Maltball Weight Scheme pE7
Stories in Today’s Other Sections
Two stoned lads and a librarian unveil plans to put D&D funland on the moon............ E2 You might just be surprised by how poorly your deodorant works............................... F6 Opinion: Where can I register to accept free cannabis?.................................................. G13 Sister's boyfriend sends high five............ H1
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Dispatches from the Highlands
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Cannatown News
DUDEFLATION REPORTEDLY THREATENS BROCONOMY
National dudeflation remains higher than anyone ever anticipated going into the holi- day season. Cool dudeflation rose .420% in November, adjusted for seasonal swings but far worse than previous months, the Bureau of Boring Statistics reportedThursday. Rising prices on hats and VR’s contributed to at least half of the increase, while prices for
great for Trolleys, and it’s happening even though demand for bell-incessant, slow-mov- ing, open-air travel is recovering from the worst of the pandemic, and largely, a century of irrelevance. So it goes. "How did we get started on Trolleys?" asked Lott. "Oh yes, we were talking about our grandfathers. Sorry for the tangent."
mancave furnish- ings and subscrip- tion shaving kits
also climbed. And an index
that tracks new nuggersh prices roses 4.20% over the quarter, mak- ing the biggest jump since the middle ages. The increase in hover- board costs, and earbuds, is also worrying, says economist Carol Lott. “People paid extra for inflatable hot tubs last year,”
she wrote in a note. “To help, the government gradually phases in nuggersh in- creases over time. But it’s about to become a huge freakin’ source of dudeflation right here onMain Street.” Stripping out live rosin and micro-fiber underwear costs--both which tend to be more volatile--prices rose 4.20% over the same period, the same rate as in September. But not everything in Cannatown got more expensive. Trolley tickets, for example, keep getting cheaper. The price index for fares dropped 75% over the last year. That’s not
On a cold Friday, a Dude leaves the patisserie with his baguettes, which have gone up 4.20%
With the explosion of dudes and dude-re- lated stuff, perhaps due to generational shift, today's broconomy is in a greater peril than it's ever been, and many wonder how long it will sustain under the pressure. "Soon we'll reach a tipping point as far as dudes go," said Lott. "We might fix labor shortages and growing expenses for materials -- but when it comes down to it, the bro- conomy depends on dudes bein' dudes."
Vol 8. Edition 6
News from CannaTown
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Cannatown News
Major Cannatown Employer Requires Positive Drug Test ToWork
With the downturn of the economy looming on Cannatown, one of its oldest and biggest employers, Two-Star Manufacturing, has announced they will begin testing for Delta-9 THC in employment screening as it seeks to expand operations at a time when applicants are in short supply. But the company says it’s
the only surefire way to know if a staff member will be able to handle the full spectrum of terpy, dank nuggersh. “Only science can confirm that an em- ployee actually does consume THC, such that we can place them appropriately by level of tolerance,” said spokesperson Eluva Sweetskunk, who reiterated that measures go into effect next month, pending a rigorous adjunct review by the janitorial staff. Although considered controversial, Two- Star policy has long-maintained that levels of THC-use, measured via screening, are meant to ensure employees are matched with the salary--paid in cannabis and cannabis-de- rived goods--at an adequate market-potency value. In the early 2000’s, such matching fell by the wayside--but now Two-Star is com- mitting to a zero-tolerance policy. Essen- tially, any applicants, or employees, with zero tolerance, will be fired immediately. “There’s no way in hell we’re paying someone around here in shwag or brick,” Sweetskunk said. “It’s just company policy. Specifically, section 4.2.0.” For years, the industry’s trend of low-grade “ditchweed-positions” led to “terrible crafts- manship” and, as far as Two-Star workplace accidents go, an era of “near-daily amputa- tions and traumatizing spectacles.”
Those grimy dime-sacks are a thing of the past now. However, some prospective em- ployees, wary of the new policy, are report- edly spooked. “I’ve only been smokin’ mid- dies and a couple tops to hold me lately,” one offered anonymously. “But I don’t want them thinkin’ I’m just middie-level-material.” Another, applying for an executive level position, was suddenly worried about his prospects. “I’m really looking for a high- potency sativa long-term--That’s why I’m honestly wondering about having a buddy do the test for me,” he admitted, nervously run- ning his finger under a luxury Snucci-brand hemp necklace. Elsewhere, cash-strapped recruiters have been forced to forego testing, instead us- ing rudimentary forms of screening, such as “fast-tracking anyone who applies or interviews in their pajamas,” as a stop-gap solution, according to staffing manager Joan Zenferhash of Cannatown Wizzorks! job agency. “Interviewers are becoming quite keen on details like bits of pizza in the beard, smeared lip-stick on the forehead, even the stench of week-old cheese wontons,” she said. “It’s not as exact as a drug-test--but in this hiring famine, we’re learning to rely on common sense.”
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Dispatches from the Highlands
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Cannatown News Stiggy Fezertz Launches Own Version of Twitter: Truedatyo Former captain of the city horseshoe team, Stiggy Fezertz, says he is staging his own version of Twitter, called "Truedatyo." The website's launch would make it only the 1,562,432,390th such alternate version of the social media giant, whose followers now outnumber the global population. Even prior to formally opening for users, blazed cadets looking for cat photos at 3am managed to find the site, sign up as Stiggy Fezertz and a slew of other former team captains, and openly mock Fezertz on his own profile. Not to be outdone, Fezertz promptly set his com- puter ablaze, then bludgeoned it apart with hatchets. While it fixed the problem at home, he would later find every other device was able to access the publicly-viewable insults, and has since gone into hiding. Meanwhile, developers point out that Truedatyo appears to be the actual Twitter platform--website, mobile application, even, matching propri- etary code library, except with the Truedatyo logo printed in red, white and blue. "Only half of the icons have been replaced," said web en- gineer Sinez Larson. "It's clear, when you see the little bird thing all over the place, this is New Bomb-Sniffing Dogs in Town Sniff Out Bomb Reefer If you've encountered dog walkers struggling to keep their grasps on incessantly-barking dogs, followed by small gangs of what appear to be detectives and investigative journal- ists furtively writing and photographing as they dive down alleys, then you've likely been witness to the new bomb-sniffing canine unit currently training in town. New security funds have allowed for the prioritization of such extra measures. "Basically these dogs can smell 'da bomb' alot more clearly than the rest of us," says trainer Christ Shrofe. "They have a knack for uncovering the dankest, bombest weed in the vicinity, somethingmost other animals
Fezertz attempts to show off the totally original Truedatyo
literally Twitter. Like, they illegally copied it. Maybe even copy-pasted it." Although the launch was a brief hit with in- vestors, some wonder how the business will survive, but some point out that the model itself will force evolution. "Most likely, as with Fezertz' other ventures, his next move is probably to sue Twitter for trademark in- fringement," speculated Cannatown Univer- sity Finance Professor Brenda Morey. "Litiga- tion is the new model. Not rebranding." Fezertz' office responded to inquiries with a type-written letter stating: "We are not sure what the problem is, since Mr. Fezertz was so influential in the original invention of social media, and we have the tippity-top, bestiest best social media in the whole worldy-world."
can't do, with the exception of Wes who works in the mail room." The city is com- mitting to a 1-year program to sniff out, identify, propo- gate and roast any and all bomb strains growing in
city gardens and common areas. "This is ambi- tious," Shrofe says, "but dogs like Cocoa here can smell skunky kind bud up to a mile away."
Vol 8. Edition 6
News from CannaTown
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BUZZARDS
by Rolv Harris
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Dispatches from the Highlands
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Opinion
I Didn't Even Know Pyromancer Was a Job by Hugh Jollydab
What’s up dudemankind? I’ve been pretty much losing all my extra money on crypto these days, so I asked my bud, who’s making bank, like, how does he know when it’s best to buy? And you know what he told me? That he goes to a pyromancer ! Now that I think about it, he was probably joking, but get this: It’s real. It turns out, you can just, like, tell the future by lighting shit on fire. Not only that, but it’s my new job! That's right, today is my first day as a pyromancer. Wish me luck! Can you believe it? I didn’t even know pyromancer was a job . Online I found this forum that was like, people saying they’d totally go to a pyromancer, but there weren’t any in the area, and I was thinking, are you kidding? There’s serious money to be made here! Just one problem, like, what’s a pyro- mancer? So I did a bunch of research, read a bunch of websites and got certified. And then I scraped together all the change I could find in my apartment to get a double-line, 1-week classified ad in the local newspaper. Success, here I come! What? Not familiar? If you’re new to divination I totally get ya. Yea, pyromancy. Turns out, it’s a thing, and not only that but like, so are auras and crystals and all that. Have you heard of that kind of stuff? ‘Cause it’s a lot to repeat, and I was only like, half- listening to the girl at the head shop. Lotta information! But then, like, another dude I cheefed with down by the river said, he’d totally go to a pyromancer over a fortune teller any day of the week. Especially because he could easily, like, light a blunt while he watches the pyromancer. But not just any chode can become a mage, otherwise we’d all be trippin’ on Fourth of July! You gotta be certified to be a true pyromancer, at least that’s what the brochure said. I went to a little specialized school in an old auto-shop (don’t worry, people were
extremely covid-aware, like the whole staff wore ski-masks). I burned myself a ton, like, can you see how my left eyebrow is just growing back in? But man it was worth it. My certificate is coming in the mail, but I got the temporary diploma, retro-printed on an original dot-matrix printer. I was going to frame it, but I schlepped it up on the wall with some duct tape at least. Now it’s time to get some wood and charcoal or sticks and put them in the old grill kettle I got propped up on bricks in the backyard. I figure, get some lighter fluid, let the hot embers roast, and then spray it with some Pam when I do the conjuring and such. I think I’m ready for customers! Definitely ready for some visions too (I just puffed through a half-gram of some gnar ros). Last night my buddy came by and we built a bonfire to practice but we ended up burning one of his eyebrows off too. And I think I saw a vision of him getting some groceries, which ended up happening later on! So it’s not some sort of, you know, sham . I’m not a con artist . Anyway, I better go check my voicemail. This is exciting! Who would’ve thought. After a half year on the job search, I finally found my calling. This is the dream, sittin’ around, playing video games, waiting for customers to come by, so I can light my garbage on fire and tell them the funky stuff I see while I smake. It’s perfect, duders. Let’s just say the holidays came early for ol’ Hugh.
Vol 8. Edition 6
News from CannaTown
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Christember in Cannatown
Yes, Virginia, There is a St. Nickeljoint First published in the CannaTown Register , 1897
Dear Editor, I am 18 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Saint Nickeljoint. But my homie said, “If ya see it in Cannapages, it is so.” Please tell me the truth, is there a St. Nickeljoint? - Virginia O’Green Virginia, Those skeptic dudes are are wrong. They’ve been affected by the total drag of the downer age. They do not believe except what they smake. They think that nothing can be, which is not smake-able by their little bowls. All bowls, Virginia, whether they be men’s, or women’s, are little. In this great Canniverse of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, especially when medicated. Yes, Virginia, there is a St. Nickeljoint. He exists as certainly as sparkling flower, and hash oil, and keef-rolled wax-infused doobies, and you know that these things abound and give to our life its high- est, highest joy. And munchies. Alas! How big a bummer, would be the world if there were no St. Nickeljoint! As much a drag, as if there were no Virginias! There would be no illustrious highs, no jolts through the atmosphere, bitzkrieg smack-dabs or flying through space to make tolerable this existence. The eternal bowl with which cadet-hood fills the world, would be cashed out, cashed ! Not believe in St. Nickeljoint? You might as well not believe in Rupert the Red-eyed Reindeer! You might get your homies to watch all the couches in town, just to catch Nickeljoint crashing for a few hours, then roasting a bowl before duck-taping Zip-loc bags full of freshly-cured cannabis upon the mantel--but even if they didn’t see this very spectacle, what would that prove? Nobody sees St. Nickeljoint, not since he gave all his clothes and belongings away on the Amsterdam river flats in the 80’s. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t a Nickeljoint. The most real things in the world, are the things you only see when you’re higher than a kite and sitting in your own living room. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course you did, we all did, when the Durban Poison wax came through town. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders that are unseen, unless we keep smakin’ on that wax. Where was I? Oh, yes. Only a true, teary-eyed roast can push aside that curtain, to view the supernatural glory of cannabis beyond our wildest dreams. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world, there is nothing else that totally abides so hard. No St. Nickeljoint? Thank God he lives and he lives forever, up in the Highlands! A thousand years from now, maybe 4 times 20 years from now, he will continue to make glad the hearts of cadets!
Season's Greetings From Purp Yuletide greetin's, ya smooth bastards. Let me be the first to offer the most congenial of welcomes. Why am I so charitable on this crisp autumnal day? Because of the harvest, my vast bales of crops, hangin' to dry at the homestead. Y'all need some purp? I got that. I got that purp right here. And this ain't just any purp. This my friends is a special cultivar of grand delight, one entrusted to me by the divine. When the crop finishes curin', the holiday will suddenly fit together. All means of spectacular news will fly about the yuletide purp at Purp's Purp. Just you wait, for the headlines, for the front page photo- graphical documentation. That's right, it'll happen, sure and begorra, or my name ain't Bertrand DePurp the Third . Now I'm sure St. Nickel- joint will bless y'all this month, but remember, even the sparkliest elf- grown highlands nugget goes fast, especially 'round the family circle. Lest y'all cast yer winter stash to fortuity, y'all better stock up. She's a gorgeous goddess of flower and she goes quick. So, y'all need that purp? I got that, right here .
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Dispatches from the Highlands
$4.20 Cents
Album Notes from Erickson “The Soundtrack to your Chill” Cat Stevens Teaser and the Firecat (50th Anniversary) Alright folks, it's anniversary time again. This one might seem slightly out of left field, although not as far out there as our Obscure October series (read at Cannapages.com).
White Denim Crystal Bullets / King Tears
Can a single be an album? Can an album exist if it is never formally acknowledged as such? In the curious case of White Denim's rollout of "Crystal Bullets / King Tears" as a 12", the answer is yes.
The Austin band dropped the pair of tunes digitally at the end of July. Shortly thereafter when the vinyl version appeared in stores, as needle
While this album will be getting the full 50th anniver- sary super-deluxe special sauce-lettuce cheese-pickles- onions treatment featuring a smatter- ing of demos, alter-
hit groove, unsuspecting fans were greeted to the realization that a nine-song effort was bestowed upon them, getting far more than they bargained for in the best way possible. While White Denim's website proudly pro- motes the single, as far as I can tell the only acknowledgment from James Petralli and co. that it is in fact a proper album, is courtesy of a single tweet in reply. Still not fully available digitally, I may never have heard the whole record without the ser- endipity of stumbling into a rip of the vinyl. One of the better albums I've heard this year, I can only hope it reaches a wider audience. The marketing tactics, or lack thereof, are fascinating. Perhaps that's the point. Maybe every so often, we can have nice things. This is as White as the Denim gets in Pe- tralli's world. Who knows if/when this would be 11th full-length LP will get a release in any other format. Whatever it is, it is undoubt- edly a worthy addition to their impressive catalogue of catchy groove rock. Notable Autumn: Checkout Sometimes I Might Be Introvert by UK rapper Little Simz. Septem- ber's album reveals an artist in total command, one unafraid to correctly assert her virtuosity, yet unwilling to engage in that which others fall prey to with the expectations of stardom.
nate takes, live versions, etc., on, curiously, November 12, it was in fact October 1, 1971, when Cat Stevens gave the world Teaser and the Firecat , solidifying his genteel place in the industry, and building upon the success of the more-fondly remembered today Tea for the Tillerman , released just 10 months prior. Depending on your familiarity with Cat Stevens, aka Yusuf Islam, aka Yusuf, aka Yusuf / Cat Stevens, you'll likely recognize multiple songs. "Peace Train" is the enduring tune, but "Morning Has Broken," "Bitterblue," and "Moonshadow" may well spark memories for listeners in melody if not in name. There are no frills on Teaser and the Firecat and no grand desire from the songwriter to make art for any other reason than channel- ing that which he knows, a necessary release valve. Pureness is the pervading quality. There is also no filler, just top-notch song- writing across this 33-minute masterpiece. And although Teaser's predecessor is widely regarded as the Englishman's peak, to me this 10-song effort represents the pinnacle of a fantastic career and comfortably resides in the upper echelon of the folk rock genre.
Vol 8. Edition 6
News from CannaTown
Page 15
Recipes from Cousin D Dan Henrickson, long-time friend of Cannapages, is a chef, actor, and all-around dope viking who uses his talents to pursue his dreams. Find him on Facebook and TikTok @TheCousinD for more infused recipes, cooking videos, and news about his upcoming reality show! Essential Hash Oil Mini Muffins These morsels have that texture you get from those big gas station muffins: moist, dense, yet fluffy. In this particular batch I used cinnamon baking chips and added cocoa to conjure a sort of Mexican chocolate zest. Ingredients: 3 sticks butter, softened 1 medicated stick butter, softened 4 eggs 1 cup white sugar 1 cup honey 2 cans sweetened condensed milk
Directions: To begin, premedicate one stick of butter with your preferred dosage. Preheat to 350° and gather your mini muffin tin and liners. Cream together all butter, sugar, eggs, honey, sour cream, milk and one cup of milk. Blend in the flour, baking powder, salt, pudding mix and baking chips. If the texture is a little bit dry, add the remaining half cup of milk. Note that cocoa powder was used for a ‘double chocolate effect’ -- but feel free to ex- periment with different puddings and chips. I used a handy #70 scoop to get the perfect heaping rounded dollop to nearly fill a liner. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes, or adjust to longer time for full-sized muffins. This recipe yields about 12 dozen. If you put in about 720 mg of active product that would give you 5 mg per muffin. You decide how strong they are! After you remove them from the tin to cool, wait approximately 10 min, then while still slightly warm, seal in ziploc bags to lock in moisture when they set. These are best eaten cool, for the full texture experience. Bon Appétit!
8 oz sour cream 1-1 1/2 cups milk 5 cups flour 2 tsp baking powder 1 tsp salt
2 small boxes chocolate pudding 1 cup of cocoa powder (optional) 2 bags your choice baking chips
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NATIONAL NEWS
$4.20 Cents
INDUSTRY UPDATES Cannabis Banking ReformProgresses Bills advance in US House in new Defense Act The Secure And Fair Enforcement (SAFE) Banking Act has once again passed through the U.S. House of Representatives after its inclusion as part of the National Defense Authorization Act. The bill would allow cannabis businesses access to bank- ing services such as loans and credit card processing. Passage in the Senate remains unlikely.
LA Prepares to Dismiss Convictions Will affect tens of thousands of records The L.A. County District Attorney’s of- fice will expunge nearly 60,000 canna- bis-related convictions in accordance with a 2018 law passed by the Califor- nia legislature. In 2020, close to 66,000 such convictions were expunged in L.A. County, though potentially hundreds of thousands more have yet to be.
Federal Vaccine Mandate Coming New rule likely to apply to cannabis industry A proposed rule by the Biden Adminis- tration requiring companies with 100 or more employees to mandate COVID-19 vaccines will likely apply to cannabis businesses despite their operation type. The regulation is expected to be imple- mented soon by the Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA).
Great Resignees Flock to Cannabis Retail, restaurant workers choose a higher road Retail and restaurant workers are flocking to the cannabis industry, according to The Washington Post . Cannabis businesses have weathered the pandemic better than others (being deemed essential in many areas), allowing them to continue opera- tion during lock downs, and workers see opportunity in the burgeoning industry.
Vol 8. Edition 6
COLORADO NEWS
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INDUSTRY UPDATES Higher Ed: Colleges Teach Cannabis Curriculums taught at 5 Colorado universities Several Colorado universities are expanding offerings of cannabis-centric courses. The University of Denver, University of Colora- do Boulder, Metropolitan State University of Denver, CSU-Pueblo, and Community Col- lege of Denver are all offering cannabis law, science and business courses among a roster of classes aimed at preparing students for ca- reers in a growing number of fields.
Office Opens To Assist Entrepeneurs Will support those affected by war on drugs A new program will provide opportunities in the cannabis industry to disadvantaged communities.The Cannabis Business Office looks to provide access to investment capital and technical assistance to low-income res- idents, those living in disadvantaged areas, and those who've been, or have had family members arrested for a marijuana offense.
Aurora Axes Cannabis TourismPlan City council's hospitality plan narrowly fails The Aurora City Council narrowly voted down a cannabis hospitality measure to allow for consumption in lounges and on bus tours. The 5-4 vote means the mea- sure can be reintroduced following the November election, rather than the six- month waiting period that would have been required had the vote tied.
CDPHE Delays Hemp Testing Rules Requirements set to start in October postponed Enhanced testing requirements for hemp in Colorado have been delayed until next year. In accordance with regulations enacted ear- lier this year, hemp grown in the state would be subject to testing for pesticides, heavy metals and solvents used in cannabinoid extraction. The requirements were original- ly set to take effect in October.
MEDICAL DISPENSARY 1 st TIME PATIENT SPECIALS
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$4.20 Cents
Dispensary & Deal by City
BOULDER Boulder Botanics
Dank Of e Day - $10 1/8, $20 1/4, $40 1/2 $69 Oz - Select Strains - Prices listed before tax First time patients receive our member pricing of 20% o for the rst 3 visits! :) First time patients receive a penny half gram doobie or 10% OFF Purchase. 10% OFF ANY PURCHASE WITH VALID STUDENT ID! $99 MEMBER MED OZs! First time patients receive member pricing. First time patients receive 10% o their entire purchase. Member Pricing Available for First Time Patients. We accept cash and ATM cards. Medical members get 20% o non-member pricing at the Medical Store. ALL PATIENTS! $99 Top Shelf Ounces First time customers have their choice of an ounce for $110 +tax or an 8th for $18 +tax. ey also receive member pricing on anything else in the store. Free joint with purchase + member pricing. First Time Patients Receive Member Pricing on Everything in the Shop! Industry and Vets Always Receive Member Pricing! 10% o all rst time patients, even on top of existing deals! First Time Patients receive 20% o ! First time shoppers get member pricing- $20 eighths, $120 ounces, 15 for $20 joints, and MORE! all tax included! We o er MEMBER PRICING FOR 1ST TIME PATIENTS! First-time patients receive a member discount on our Platinum and Gold shelves. First timers! Come in and receive any 1/8 of ower or a gram of house shatter or wax for $15 for any patient yet to visit us in our store. First time medical patients will receive member bene ts on their rst visit All rst time patients receive member pricing and a .10 cent bud rolled joint. 1st time patients receive 15% o our non-member prices (Excludes Sale Items) First Time Patients get Member Pricing and you can choose from any of our daily specials! TM TM
Boulder Wellness Center Green Tree Medicinals
Magnolia Road Cannabis Co. Root MMC
Terrapin Care Station e Peaceful Choice Trill Alternatives
DENVER A Cut Above
ALLGREENS Apothecary Farms
Ascend Cannabis Co Cure Colorado Denver Dispensary
Green Cross Caregivers Green Cross of Cherry Creek Herbal Remedies
High Level Health Higher Grade
Kind Love Kind Meds La Bodega Lush
Bonus .5g ower with purchase 15 1/8, $30 1/4, $55 1/2, $110 1oz First-time Patients can purchase 1x $15 Eighth - ANY STRAIN and
Lyon’s Finest 2 Medicine Man Mighty Tree
First-Time Customer Top Shelf 1/8 - $15 OR First-Time Customer Top Shelf Ounce - $79 All rst time patients receive 15% o all edibles and single grams of concentrate // Flower ounce Member Pricing First time in? Recieve a penny pre-roll! FIRST TIME MED RECEIVES PRIMARY PATIENT PRICING, $1 PREROLL, AND DAILY SPECIAL! First time patients receive member pricing!
New Amsterdam Organics Northern Lights Cannabis Co
Pineapple Exchange Seed & Smith Cannabis Simply Pure Standing Akimbo Stash House e Clinic Highlands
1ST TIME MEDICAL PATIENTS GET MEMBER PRICING! All rst time medical customers get the member deal for that day! First-Time Patients Receive Member Pricing. New patients will receive member pricing on rst visit. First-Time Patients receive 15% o the FIRST TWO purchases!!! All Medical Patients will receive 20% o their entire order for their rst time visit! First time medical patients receive member pricing
TM
e Kind Room Universal Herbs
LAKEWOOD Kind Pain Management Ajoya Ascend Cannabis Co.
TM
During your rst visit you will receive 15% o all regularly priced items! First-Time Patient Special: Member Pricing on your rst visit 10% o all rst time patients!
WHEAT RIDGE Options Medical Center
New patients get 20% o rst purchase.
NOTICE: ese dispensary 1st-time patient deals are MEDICAL ONLY , may have changed without notice, and dispensaries are NOT obligated to give discount noted. Please call ahead to con rm special. Refer to listings section for phone numbers/addresses.
84
7
66
66
65
LONGMONT
87
25
83
287
36
91
66
25
62
BOULDER
55
25
63
25
26
WESTMINSTER 27
121
29
BROOMFIELD
79
66
76
THORNTON
ARVADA ARVADA
87
21
70
43
70
6
87
49
66
19
53 51 80
3
47
4
14
81
DENVER
17
37
18
45
2
301
38
41 16
90
34
6
13 11
32
42
88 5
31 64
33
LAKEWOOD
78
52
85
William Frederick Hayden Park
89
9
14
95
1
36
40
121
Beer Creek Lake Park
85
285
69
6
76
THORNTON
Rocky Mountain Arsenal National
Refuge
56
COMMERCE CITY
36
35
22
48
57
46
8
70
77
54
39
36
73
74
44
67
61
AURORA
71
Buckley Air Force Base
82
10
60
225
25
68
12
87
72
58
75
Elk Mountain
72
134
GRANBY
Apache Peak
28
30
23
119
40
59
20
76
24
70
86
SPRINGS IDAHO
70
24
Grays Peak
Mt Evans
CARBONDALE
285
50
9
Mt Lincoln
82
24
70
ASPEN
Mt Elbert
LEADVILLE
Capitol Peak
DISPENSARIES 1 A Cut Above 2 AMCH 3 Chronic Therapy
32 Kind Meds 33 La Bodega
65 Terrapin Care Station, 20th Ave 64 Terrapin Care Station, 1 Broadway 62 Terrapin Care Station, Folsom St 63 Terrapin Care Station, Manhattan Cir The Green Solution, S Mill 70 The Green Solution, S Potomac 71 The Green Solution, S Peoria 72 The Green Solution, E Montview 73 The Clinic, South Colorado Blvd 68 The Clinic, S Wadsworth Blvd 69 The Clinic, West 32nd Ave 66 The Clinic, East Colfax Ave 67 The Green Solution, E Colfax 74 The Green Solution, E Quincy 75 The Green Solution, Gregory 76 The Green Solution, Grape 77 The Green Solution, W Alameda 78 The Green Solution, Federal 79 The Green Solution, Wewatta 80 The Green Solution, W 20th 81 The Green Solution, E Kentucky 82 The Green Solution, S Main 83 The Green Solution, Malley 84 The Green Solution, Federal 85 The Green Solution, Water 86 The Lodge, High 87 The Lodge, Federal 88 The Stone Dispensary 89 Trenchtown 90 Xclusive Cannabis Dispensary 91
35 LaConte's, Washington 34 LaConte's, 7th 36 Little Brown House Local Product Of Colorado 37
6 Doc's Apothecary, Globeville 5 Diego Pellicer, W Alameda Ave 4 Denver Kush Club 7 Doc's Apothecary, 112th 9 Golden Meds, S Santa Fe Golden Meds, S Oneida 10 Golden Meds, Bryant 11 Golden Meds, S Quebec 12 8 Golden Meds, Peoria 13 Golden Meds, Federal 14 Golden Meds, S Broadway 15 Golden Meds, Youngfield 16 Herbs 4 You 17 High Level Health, E Colfax Ave 18 High Level Health, Lincoln St 19 High Level Health, Market St 20 High Level Health, County Rd
Mary Jane's House 39 Mana Supply Co 38 Mighty Tree 40 Mile High Green Cross 41 Peak Dispensary 42 Pure Marijuana Dispensary, 40th 43 Pure Marijuana Dispensary, E Colfax 44 Pure Marijuana Dispensary, Bannock 45 Pure Marijuana Dispensary, Ivy 46 Pure Marijuana Dispensary, Sheridan 47 Reefer Madness Dispensary 48 RiNo Supply Co 49 Rocky Mountain High, Buggy Cir 50 Rocky Mountain High, 20th 51 Rocky Mountain High, Alameda 52 Rocky Mountain High, Wazee 53 Rocky Mountain High, Stapleton 54
21 High West Cannabis 22 House of Dankness 23 Igadi, Lawrence St 25 Igadi, S Public Rd 26 Igadi, Courtesy Rd 27 Igadi, W Dillon Rd 24 Igadi, Colorado Blvd 28 Igadi, N Jefferson St 29 Igadi, Washington St 31 Karmaceuticals 30 Igadi, US HWY 40
South Park Farma 56 Seed & Smith, Hecla Way 55 Spark Dispensary 57
Strawberry Fields, S Yosemite 58 Strawberry Fields, Downieville 59 Terrapin Care Station, E Mississippi Ave 60 Terrapin Care Station, E 33rd Ave 61
Dispensary Listings
PAGE 25
Including Boulder, Denver, Edgewater, Englewood, Glendale, Golden, Lakewood, Littleton, Longmont, Louisville, Northglenn, Sheridan, Thornton & Wheat Ridge Also Arvada, Aurora, Aspen, Bailey, Basalt, Berthoud, Black Hawk, Breckenridge, Carbondale, Central City, Commerce City, Crested Butte, Dacono, Dillon, Downieville, Dumont, Eagle, Edwards, Empire, Federal Heights, Frisco, Garden City, Georgetown, Glenwood Springs, Idaho Springs, Lafayette, Leadville, Log Lane Village, Lyons, Nederland, Niwot, Rifle, Salida, Silver Plume, Silverthorne, Steamboat Springs, Telluride, Westminster & Vail Every attempt has been made to insure the accuracy of these listings and their inclusion. CANNAPAGES.COM does not accept responsibility or liability for any omissions or errors in your listing. For changes in your listing (name, address and telephone nunber), please contact us directly at 720-339-2259 or email info@cannapages.com. For complete & searchable Colorado dispensary listings visit www.cannapages.com RECREATIONAL + MEDICAL RECREATIONAL MEDICAL KEY:
ARVADA
AURORA
Yuma Way Berkeley 5389 Sheridan Blvd ........................................ Arvada 720-310-8057 Alternative Medical Solutions 106 S. Mill St., Ste 203 ............................................................ Aspen 970-544-8142 Green Dragon 400 E. Hyman Ave #1A............................................... Aspen 970-429-4035 LEAF (Locals Emporium of Alternative Farms) 555 E. Durant Ave #2E ............................................................ Aspen 970-920-4220 Native Roots 308 S. Hunter St ........................................................... Aspen 970-429-4443 Silver Peak Apothecary 520 E. Cooper Ave. Suite LL2 ................................................. Aspen 970-925-4372 Stash 300 Aspen Airport Business Center Suite B ............................. Aspen 970-925-6468 THE GREEN SOLUTION 106 S Mill St.............................................. Aspen 970-760-0284 see ad on page 51 - cannasavers page 131 Altitude 10455 East Colfax Avenue................................................... Aurora 303-343-0166 Colorado Harvest Company 11002 East Yale Avenue, Unit A ............................................. Aurora 720-535-9489 Euflora 6260 South Gun Club Road ................................................... Aurora 303-766-8677 4343 South Buckley Road, Unit E .......................................... Aurora 303-680-1016 Good Chemistry 16840 East Iliff Avenue .......................................... Aurora 303-745-2420 Green Dragon 719 Billings Street................................................................ Aurora 720-458-6950 19151 East Quincy Avenue ................................................. Aurora 303-400-1451 Lightshade 503 Havana Street.................................................................. Aurora 720-899-3030 16821 East Iliff Avenue ........................................................... Aurora 720-575-6703 Livwell 19201 E Colfax Ave ................................................................ Aurora 303-366-1077 1401 Peoria Street.................................................................. Aurora 303-993-7548 LOVA Aurora 19005 E Quincy Ave.................................................... Aurora 720-379-4554 Medicine Man 1901 South Havana Street ..................................................... Aurora 303-923-3825 Rocky Road 1712 South Chambers Road ........................................ Aurora 720-277-0320 Starbuds 14655 East Arapahoe Road, Unit A........................................ Aurora 303-699-1222 1408 Del Mar Parkway, Units D1 & D2................................... Aurora 720-949-1389 TERRAPIN CARE STATION 11091 E Mississippi Ave, Ste A................ Aurora 303-954-8402 11900 E 33rd Avenue, Ste 1 .................... Aurora 303-954-8402 see ad on page 143 - cannasavers page 129
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REC MED MED+REC
BOULDER Dispensaries | CANNAPAGES.COM
AURORA
THE GREEN SOLUTION 350 S. Potomac St ................................... Aurora 720-501-2371 3179 S. Peoria Ct .................................... Aurora 720-501-2370 10195 E Montview Blvd ........................... Aurora 720-689-2351 14301 E. Colfax Ave. ............................... Aurora 720-501-2372 19370 E. Quincy Ave ............................... Aurora 303-990-9723 see ad on page 51 - cannasavers page 131 XCLUSIVE CANNABIS 15200 E 6th Ave ...................................... Aurora 720-738-4200 see ad on inside front cover - cannasavers page 139 Sunrise Solutions 43 Main St............................................................ Bailey 303-816-6337 Aspen Roaring Fork Wellness 24505 Highway 82................................................................... Basalt 970-279-5072 Green Tree Medicinals 1090 N. 2nd St ........................................ Berthoud 970-670-9120 Herb’s Medicinals 1015 2nd St..................................................... Berthoud 970-344-5060 Mindful 1017 N. 2nd St.................................................................. Berthoud 970-644-6550 Alternative Medical Supply 9 Karlann Dr................................. Black Hawk 303-582-0420 Mindful 231 Gregory St. (Store 1859) ....................................... Black Hawk 303-582-3510 Rocky Mountain Organics 5412 Hwy. 119............................... Black Hawk 303-582-5032 THE GREEN SOLUTION 231 Gregory St ................................. Black Hawk 303-990-9723 see ad on page 51 - cannasavers page 131 14er Holistics 2897 Mapleton Avenue, Suite 800........................................ Boulder 303-539-6525 Boulder Botanics 1750 30th Street Unit 7...................................... Boulder 720-379-6046 Boulder Wellness 5420 Arapahoe Avenue, Unit F ......................... Boulder 303-442-2565 Drift 1750 30th Street, Unit 12 ......................................................... Boulder 720-612-4382 Eclipse Cannabis Company 933 Alpine Avenue Suite 2.................................................... Boulder 720-420-0782 Elements 1534 55th Street .............................................................. Boulder 303-444-0861 Fresh Baked 2539 Pearl Street ....................................................... Boulder 303-440-9393 Green Dream Cannabis 6700 Lookout Road, Suite #5 ............................................... Boulder 303-530-3031 Green Tree Medicinals 5565 Arapahoe Avenue, Suite G............... Boulder 303-440-6700 Helping Hands Herbals 1021 Pearl Street, Suite B........................ Boulder 303-444-1564 Karing Kind 5854 Rawhide Court ................................................... Boulder 303-449-9333 Magnolia Road Cannabis Company 1750 30th Street Unit 84B .................................................... Boulder 720-502-4867 Maikoh Holistics 2750 Glenwood Dr. Ste 8 .................................... Boulder 720-476-6805 MMJ America 1909 Broadway Street LL......................................... Boulder 303-862-4064 Native Roots 1146 Pearl Street ....................................................... Boulder 720-726-5126 Root Organic Mmc 5420 Arapahoe Road, Unit D........................... Boulder 303-443-0240 TERRAPIN CARE STATION 1795 Folsom Street ................................ Boulder 303-954-8402 5370 Manhattan Circle, Suite 104 .......... Boulder 303-954-8402 see ad on page 143 - cannasavers page 129 The Dandelion 845 Walnut Street ................................................... Boulder 303-459-4676 The Farm 2801 Iris Avenue.............................................................. Boulder 303-440-1323 The Growing Kitchen 8401 Baseline Road .................................... Boulder 303-578-8454 The Health Center 537 Canyon Boulevard ..................................... Boulder 720-532-8664 The Peaceful Choice 7464 Arapahoe Avenue Unit A9 ................... Boulder 720-366-6615
REC MED MED+REC
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BOULDER CANNAPAGES.COM | Dispensaries
COMMERCE CITY
The Station 3005 28th Street .......................................................... Boulder 303-442-0892 The Village Green Society 2043 16th Street.................................. Boulder 720-746-9064 Trill Alternatives 1537 Pearl Street, Suite B ................................... Boulder 720-287-0645 Verde Natural 302 Pearl Street ....................................................... Boulder 303-993-3066 Alpenglow Botanicals 1805 Airport Rd., Unit B1C................. Breckenridge 970-389-6839 Breckenridge Organic Therapy 1900 Airport Rd, Suite A1 ............................................. Breckenridge 970-453-0420 Green Dragon 1795 Airport Rd. Unit A3 .................................. Breckenridge 970-453-4900 Organix 1795 Airport Rd Unit A2 ............................................. Breckenridge 970-453-1340 Ascend Cannabis Co 204 E W Main St................................... Buena Vista 719-395-6226 Colomed Center 615 Buggy Circle APT D ................................ Carbondale 970-963-4669 Medical Marijuana Center of Carbondale 60 N 3rd St. .................................................................... Carbondale 970-510-5229 The Doctor’s Garden Dispensary 580 Main Street #300 ..................................................... Carbondale 970-963-9323 Bonfire Cannabis Company “Annie’s” 135 Nevada St................................................ Central City 303-582-3072 Green Grass 440 Lawrence St. ................................................. Central City 303-582-5088 IGADI 171 Lawrence St ............................... Central City 303-582-3093 see ad below - cannasavers page 91 Aroma 5433 Quebec Street ................................................. Commerce City 303-286-0420 Cookies Denver 5385 Quebec St ....................................... Commerce City 720-780-8865 Krystaleaves 5301 Vasquez Blvd Unit 101 ......................... Commerce City 303-802-0026
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